How to turn fear into action?
In a world that tells you to not fear, I chose to make it my helper.

“Why would you do that?”
“Why would you let fear within such proximity to your life?”
“Stop fearing, it does you no good,”… and so on.
These are some things you hear as soon as you tell someone that you fear something. But why?
Why don’t we allow ourselves to feel fear?
Well, the concept of fear is first introduced to us as the one feeling you should stay away from. They say, “you shouldn’t fear, it’s bad.”
But they should really tell you that fear is a normal human emotion that every human feels.
Yes, it’s probably something you don’t want, but if you do feel it it’s okay. What matters is what you do to stop that fear. But I think we should take a look at the reason why we get scared in the first place.
Most decisions I have made in the past have been of fear of not knowing the future. All of which have prevented me from creating genuine, meaningful feelings and emotions that allow humans to live a human life.
Sometimes this fear even disguises itself as rational thinking, which then tricks me into thinking the decision I made wasn’t out of fear, but the “logical thing to do.”
This has happened to me way too often when I try to form a serious relationship with someone new. As soon as I catch something that could turn into a problem I start an endless overthinking process. I over analyze all the facts and all the reasons why it won’t work out and I call it “rational thinking.”
I call it this because I have always seen fear as something to not have, as something bad and something that’s going to hurt me. I never wanted to call it what it actually was, which in this case was the fear of choosing the wrong guy; disrupting the plans I already had for my own future.
In overthinking, I was actually getting ahead of my timeline. I was thinking of how my future would be affected if I chose to stay with this guy. I was thinking, “how is this going to affect the plans I have for myself once I graduate college?” or, “how will this change the woman I’ve worked so hard to become?”
And yes, maybe if he had been the right guy I wouldn’t have overanalyzed everything, but maybe if I had given myself the chance to know him, all my concerns might have never become a reality. Or maybe if I hadn’t ran away, I could’ve felt emotions I have never felt before. The truth is that I will never know because I let my fear paralize me from experiencing what could have been one of two things: a great love or another lesson before finding my true love.
Which leads me to think that every choice I’ve made that has stopped me from living life to the fullest could have played out differently if I had just turned fear into a tool, rather than something to (ironically) fear.
What if instead of looking as fear as something to stop you from making a choice that will influence your future, we turn it around and make it something that pushes us to live our best life NOW, in the present.
For the most part, our fear only arises because we think too much of how our future will be affected. And if that’s the case, then why don’t we use that to our advantage.
“Because in the future I don’t want to regret not taking the chance now, I will choose to fear not living my best life now.”
In a way, fear can turn into something positive if you let it and if you’re wise about it.
When a new job opportunity that requires you to move across the country is given to you, don’t be afraid of taking the job because you don’t want to leave your current life behind. Be afraid of not ever getting that job opportunity again. When a new love prospect enters your life, don’t be afraid of ending up heartbroken. Be afraid of never meeting someone like that again; someone who could teach you what no one else can. When you have the chance to practice an extreme outdoor activity, don’t be afraid of what could go wrong; instead, be afraid of never getting the chance to experience that again.
And what I’m suggesting here is not to make every single choice without some thought, and I’m also not saying to say yes to every opportunity that comes up. No that’s not what I mean. I just mean, don’t make or not make choices because you’re scared of how it will affect your plans for the future. As much as you plan your life out you can never be certain of what’s ahead of you.
So, yes. Put some thought process behind your decisions. Ask your friends what they think, or seek a mentor. Do all those things not because of fear, but because they will be the lighthouses that will guide you to your destination. But remember, don’t overthink it.
Lastly, take advantage. Genuine, life changing opportunities open up when we are ready to accept them. And you’ll know right away when an opportunity is there to hurt you because it will go against everything moral you value in life. The opportunities that will change your life for the better will always be the ones you’re scared to take, AND the ones that align with who you are.
I guess my advice is to not let fear paralize you from making, what could be, the best choice of your present life. Live in the moment. Don’t think too much of a future that you can’t possibly know in detail. And if you must fear something, fear the inability to live your life to the fullest because you were scared to take that jump of faith.
