I recently read: Life has no remote, get up and change it yourself.

As an image thinker, I mediately saw the television-sets without a remote. You literally had to get out of your chair to change the channel. Unthinkable these days with an offer of many channels to choose from and the habit of getting through them fast just to see what they offer.

This does resemble the daily life we have. We choose from what we see and not what we truly need.
And accordingly, we complain life is not the way we want it.

Where it’s a ready…

Feeling you missed out on stuff in your life growing up, still, could cause problems in today’s life.

Like your past is haunting your present.

we are not always aware of this reason, we are most of the time aware of the feeling we are entitled to get something. like we are entitled to get on a holiday, or stuff of any kind. And if we can’t really afford this we still think/argue/convince ourselves we really, really need this.

Basically, if we can’t afford it we can’t have it.

If we would live by this rule many people would not…

We all have needs, we also all have conflicts. We very often don’t realise the lack of some needs is the cause of some conflicts.

When we find ourselves in our life in a not met need situation we quite often lash out to our spouse.

Start to tell him/her your needs and tell them they did not meet our needs. I tell you they should not meet your needs! As the fact you see other people getting things in their relationship you are not getting does not make your spouse the person to give you that need. If you…

Hulp vragen is voor velen van ons lastig. We denken vaak dat we alles alleen moeten doen, uitzoeken en bedenken. Of dat hulp vragen getuigd van zwakte, niets kunnen of niets weten.

Niets is minder waar.

Het getuigt van inzicht en kracht wanneer we hulp vragen of zoeken. Wie van ons weet alles over alle mogelijke onderwerpen? Niemand toch? En als we horen dat iemand een klusjesman of een specialist in iets zoekt weten we allemaal gelijk wie ze moeten bellen om de klus geklaard te krijgen. …

Actions and consequences are a packaged deal.

I read this line last week, again. We see these wisdom speeches often all over the internet options as Facebook or Instagram.

It sounds so simple; actions and consequences are a packaged deal.

To be honest this is my basic house rule. The way I taught my son. Every action gets a consequence. I don’t really belief in punishing. To teach consequence follow actions is also teaching good actions get good consequences. It’s not bad, it’s a physics law.

So, good things have consequences too? Yes of course. …

Some people just don’t answer simple questions. If you ask them how are you.

They either answer fine, make a d-tour around the answer and/or don’t reply at all.

Quite often this means they don’t want you to know how they really are. This can be for many reasons.

They just forget if you ask them you do this for a reason. You are interested in them and really want to know how they are.

So, if you listen carefully you get the answer anyway.

The no answer is an answer. This answer says: I am not okay. I am…

When we are looking for a partner or when we meet someone we like we have the tendency to change for this person. We have an illusion of when we change, the other person will appreciate us (even) more, will like us better.

This is honestly the biggest mistake anyone can make, ever! (and mostly done without thinking so don’t punish yourself if you did)

When we meet someone, we like this person for a reason. The chemistry is good or the feeling is good, just the way you like to put it.

This makes you like this person over…

Hoe doe je dat van jezelf houden.

We lezen het overal op Facebook, Instagram en in bijna ieder tijdschrift. We moeten van onszelf houden. Wat is betekend dat van onszelf houden, ik bedoel het klinkt zo simpel.

Het zou eenvoudig moeten zijn van onszelf houden. Wees eerlijk als we niet van onszelf houden wie doet het dan?

En dat precies is de crux. Als we niet van onszelf houden wie doet het dan…

Het feit dat we verwachten dat een ander ons compleet maakt… gebrek aan eigenliefde

Het feit dat we verwachten dat een ander ons liefde geeft…gebrek aan eigenliefde

How to love yourself?

We all read we should on Facebook, Instagram or any magazine. We need to love ourselves.

So, what does this mean. How do we love ourselves, I mean it sounds so simple.

Well it should be easy, to love ourselves. Be honest if we would not love ourselves who would.

And that exactly is the tricky part. If we don’t love ourselves who would….

The fact we expect others to complete us…lack of selflove

The fact we expect others to give us love…lack of selflove

The fact we expect others to give us time and attention…. lack of selflove


Ik was laatst op een school om met studenten te sparren over het opzetten van een eigen bedrijf. Het opzetten van een werkelijk bedrijf met echt geld. Hiervoor mogen de studenten niet wat inkopen en verkopen maar ze moeten een echt proces opstarten van product, produceren, financieren, verkopen en winst maken. Zoals gezegd een werkelijk werkend bedrijf.

Hierin lopen deze studenten tegen dezelfde problemen aan waar wij in de “werkende wereld” tegen aan lopen. We moeten samenwerken om productiviteit te genereren.

Het begint allemaal met een plan voor het product waarin je je bedrijf wilt starten. Dit opgezet in groepjes…


Teaching ways to evolve your life to those who hit “the wall” coach, breathing coach and conflict consultant www.mireillehoekstra.nl feel free to contact me.

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