To my friends and family who voted for Trump.


We’ve had our differences over the past two years. That’s probably an understatement.

It’s true that I wish you hadn’t voted the way you did.

But I don’t believe you are bad people. I don’t believe you are monsters.

I know you’re not.

You’ve commented on photos of my child and I’ve hit the love button on photos of yours. You’ve cheered me on when things are going well for me and you’ve offered your support when they aren’t. You’ve given me parenting advice and a true sense of community, even if it’s the Facebook kind.

I know that you voted the way you did because you worry about the same things I do: protecting your children, supporting your family, holding onto your job, feeling like the future is going to be a good one.

And you’re as frustrated and disappointed as I am by a world in which a few hyper-rich people get all the good stuff and the rest of us scramble for what’s left.

I trust that you voted for Trump because you want change, because you don’t feel like the current system is working.

I believe that you voted for him despite the hateful things he’s said.

But the problem is, there are people, lots of them, who voted for him because of those things.

Those are the people telling people of color that their lives don’t matter.

Those are the people who are spraypainting swastikas on walls.

Those are the people who are teaching their children to taunt their classmates (classmates who are U.S. citizens, just like them) that they will soon be deported.

Who are ripping hijabs off women’s heads, screaming racial slurs from car windows and a ton of other unconscionable behaviors that it’s depressing me too much to keep detailing.

That’s not okay.

I know it. And I know, I believe to my core, that you know it too.

Bu here’s the thing:

You are in a better position than I am to do something about it.

The people who say and do those things won’t listen to me or anyone else who voted for Hillary.

But they might listen to you.

So please, talk to them. When someone makes a comment that stands for everything America does not, say something. Whether that’s on a Facebook post, over the phone or in person.

Say “Hey, I’m for Trump too, but I’m not okay with this.”

Stand up for your fellow Americans who are terrified that this is no longer a country that promises liberty and justice for all.

And teach your children to stand up too.

We might not agree on policies. But I know that we all agree on decency. And it’s going to take all of us to drown out the voices of those few who are trying to make this a moment where hate triumphs over love.

Update: I’ve had dozens of Trump supporters argue that this article is one-sided. So I’d like to point you to the companion article I published the same day as this one: “To My Friends and Family Who Didn’t Vote for Trump”