My Bravest Year
Getting over perfectionism and putting it all on the line at 39.
“We’re going to run a six month coaching program based on the work of Brené Brown, are you familiar with her?”
Oh yes. The courage to be seen. Bravery born of vulnerability. That’s Brené.
In my carefully crafted world of digital professionalism, opinion and shared insight it’s incredibly challenging to be asked to publically share vulnerability. Which is why I knew I had to apply for a place in this program run by The Bravest Path for DevelopHer. I get my inspiration from those who are not only brave, audacious and brassy, but thoughtful, imperfect and faceted. Wabi-Sabi. Yet I haven’t found that I’m able to expose that part of myself to others.
I’ve got big goals in motion for 2018. They’re all risks too. I need to be brave enough to experiment and be creative, and I’ve been craving support.
So when I was accepted to be a part of this, a group of women from all over London (and beyond), urging each other on to success, it was a relief. I had accountability. I was getting help. Plus, connecting with intelligent, focused, driven women — what’s not to like?
The structure is one to one sessions and group webinars. My first coaching session set a strong foundation. I clicked with Bethan Davies, and I felt this was incredibly important in life coaching. (A brief segway into the type of terms that can be used to help, for clarity; Mentoring is opening doors and providing tangible options, and Counselling is the deeply personal tangles of your complex emotional and genealogical history. What we’re doing here is Coaching. It’s about partnering with someone who asks the right questions of you, guides you and reflects what you’re sharing to inspire you to find the answers and develop).
Before this session I had put forward an application for what I want to achieve in My Bravest Year (more to come on that in later posts), and completed a detailed questionnaire. Together we worked through some of this, and used visualisation techniques to get on the same page. Bethan rattled off an impressive suggestion of adjectives that I could use to nail down my values.
Here’s my five values. Since the session I’ve added an explanation of how I see them manifesting. It’s quite something to share this personal insight publically too. Within the hesitation I have to share, I also feel a new strengthening of resolve, because I can honestly stand by each of these as defining my truth (link is about using of my truth vs the truth).
- Integrity. Be real, be true, stand up and stand for something.
- Creativity. Embrace aesthetic, believe in infinite creative pursuit.
- Connection. Allow each infinitely elaborate exchange to spark.
- Travel. Observe, be curious, embrace adventure.
- Positivity. Relentlessly frame experience into opportunities and lessons.
Armed with this compass-like guide, we move onwards to the curated interactive webinars (the first of which is How to create authentic and connected relationships) and the best type of homework.
“Go on an Artist’s Date”, she says. Not a term I was familiar with, but certainly a practise I’ve employed in the past. These are solo adventures (3 hours plus) designed to spark creativity, get inspired, and indulge in the very important task of adult play.
I’m creating a list of 10 ‘dates’ I’d like to go on, and doing two in the next fortnight.
I’m putting my whole self into this, my goals are massive, the risks are real. This has to be my bravest year, and honestly? I can’t wait.
“Nothing lasts, nothing is finished, and nothing is perfect.”
-Richard Powell on Wabi-Sabi
MORE…
Boundaries, Bravery & Bear Traps
How to create authentic and connected relationships
Shame’s secret
Building resilience and gratitude
“It’s not failure, it’s data.”
Perfectionism prevents progress, how to stop thinking and start doing
