i was here
“Can you tell the skirt is too big? Can you see the hole in the side? Gosh I feel like a mess. I mean “silver” as the theme. I am so confused. Babe?” I say after my third attempt of outfits.
“Misty you look great!” Leo said.
“But Leo people there are fancy. I don’t really fit in, their shoes probably cost more then my outfit, actually my whole closet.” I told him.
I decided to go with it. This will work. Who cares anyways, if my man thinks I look good isn’t that all that matters?! I spray some smelly goodness on me and head down the hallway. My eyes search for Kai. I see him and my mind wonders if he would be proud to have me as his mom? My heart beats faster and is overflowing with love for our little family. The outfit and where we are going doesn’t seem to matter anymore.
I was given him.
My lips touch his forehead and I breathe him in. Trying to capture that smell, to carry with me, to remember. Taking in all the God has given me.
We get in the car. It has been away since Leo and I had been out. I reach for his hand and squeeze it. My eyes look over his profile and my mind thinks “DAMN HE IS TOO HANDSOME, how on earth did I get this man?!”
We park and walk up.
Right away I feel out of place. My mind goes places it shouldn’t. Why am I here. People start talking to me. “What do you do?” “I am an office manager” they don’t have to say anything, I can read it. They wonder what we should talk about. Small chat dies quick. My body say FOOD. Go there its your comfort space. I feel at home next to the food trucks. Conversing with the people working them is seamless, funny, and up lifting.
I placed the order for our group. My legs take me back inside and I put my little booty on my mans lap! He always brings me back to a calm place. We look at each other and realize God has given us more then we will ever deserve. We are humble servants.
The order is probably ready. I ran out solo. Courage filling my heart. I can talk business and be smart too!
The food isn’t ready yet. My feet don’t move I just stay and wait. My phone was not on my body so I just looked over the crowd. Day dreaming about where life has taken me and wondering about all these people and their walk in life.
“Hey! Hey you!” some guy to my right says. I turn and he is looking right at me.
“You!! Yes you. You are the girl that sits at the front desk at Medium right?!” He yells at me from across a few people.
I look at him and realized I do know him, very briefly.
“Yes I do sit at the front desk. Why?” I ask.
“You are the girl that makes everyone feel wonderful and taken care of when we walk in. You made me feel comfortable and were so kind. You are amazing at what you do.” He tells me
“Wow. Uh. Um. Wow. Thank you. I don’t know what to say. That means more to me then you know.” I say. Heat rises in my cheeks. My heart is full of joy and peace.
The food is ready. I grab it, turn to him and say, “I hope to see you again, have a great night.”
I try to catch my breathe. My heart is over flowing, it is bursting.
I was here.
I am here.