Restraining Order Against DocuSign
DocuSign,
This is harassment.
I have tried to be nice. Tried to tell you politely that enough is enough. Tried to say it’s over.
I have followed your outdated and insidious cancellation policy time and time again. I can cancel my account for literally anything with just a couple clicks of a button. Healthcare, car insurance, bank accounts, but for some obtuse reason:
To be honest DocuSign, that just seems like a TSA agents way of saying “We need to do a thorough pat down before you board your flight.” I still want to board the flight, and I still want to cancel my account. Making it difficult just makes me hate you.
But the worst part is that your obtuse cancellation policy was only the beginning.
Two months later, I see that you continue to harass me in my monthly credit card statements. With that torturous line that says:
DocuSign……. $15.99
I, per your “community” of the combined efforts of Vladimir Putin and Nicolas Maduro established “guidelines”, reach out again to close my account.
All I hear from the SaaS pit of hell is:
“Thank you for contacting DocuSign Support; it was my pleasure to assist you. I am marking the following case as pending closure at this time.“
Pleasure to assist me? What assistance have you provided? You’ve still erroneously charged me for three months. You have done nothing! You did what a couple lines of code should have done months ago. Might as well have sent me a picture of ice caps with a caption saying,
“Resistance is futile. — Yours truly, Global Warming”
Actually, here’s a copy of it for your future use:
I respond politely inquiring as to the status of the refund. To which I receive a:
$45? Where did you get that number?
You charged me $15.99 incorrectly for three months.
That’s easy math. Billy Madison could have done that. It may be a small difference ($2.97), but at this point I’m out for blood.
…that said… I let it go.
And I wait 10–14 business days…
Yup. I was right! No refund. But I did get another $15.99 charge to my credit card. You filthy animal!
To which I politely write Mary:
“I received another charge from Docusign this month. This is borderline criminal for you to keep charging my card after I have cancelled several times. I want to be reimbursed for this charge and assured that you will never charge this card again.“
Oops…. I need to now create a new case…
According to DocuSign, “This case is closed”.
I wish it was actually CLOSED!
But like that subscription to MonthlyTeletubbies, this case continues to haunt me. I am greeted with another lovely reply:
“We do really apologize for the inconvenience this has caused. As per request, your DocuSign account has been cancelled. A refund for *$15.00* has been submitted to start the refund process. This process can take 10–14 business days.”
$15? Now where the fuck did that come from? And what do the damn ** mean? Does does that mean you are paying me in Monopoly money?
You never reimbursed the $45 you already said you would(which was wrong to begin with, but let’s ignore that) and then you charged me another $15.99 and now you want to reimburse me $15?
This is absurd.
I inquire politely:
“Mary,
I never received any other refunds. I’m owed $96. Please reimburse me for
the full amount.
Thanks.
Will”
I’m not actually sure where the $96 came from, but I’m pretty sure I added in some pain and suffering…
If they are bad at math, why do I have to be good at it?
Mary responds:
“Hello,
Thank you for the response and my apology for the inconvenience this has caused. As per record, it shows that there was a refund for $45 that was submitted 06/01/2017. I went ahead and coordinated with our Billing Team regarding the refund.
Please don’t hesitate to let us know if you need any further assistance.
Best regards,
Mary G.”
Assistance? When did I actually get any assistance?
At the time of this post, I have not received the $45 refund and moreover DocuSign has now charged me for a fifth time after having confirmed I had cancelled my account three times.
So to be clear:
- 5 charges after my first cancellation attempt, $79.95
- 3 charges after my second cancellation attempt, $47.97
- 1 charge after my third cancellation attempt, $15,99
Yes, ATTEMPTS as they have yet to be successful…
So factoring in pain and suffering, I believe they owe me $1.34M at this point. I’m not greedy, just using DocuSign math.
I know, I know. Have the credit card company dispute the charge. Done.
I did try to login to the DocuSign account to request one more time for them to cancel my account. Futility right…
Surprisingly my password was wrong and the reset email “failed to arrive”...
You can fucking charge my credit card without a problem, but you cannot send a damn password reset email?
