Social diplomacy — do you speak it!?

First up, some self-flattery (great way to start a post)

I'm a very empathic person.

Sure, I can be egocentric, I can be neurotic, I tend to be the person talking the most and longest in any given round — yes, all true.

But while I do so, my sensors are running on turbo-mode. I look at every however minuscule change in your face, position, the way you breath and what your eyes are doing while I talk, or while you do the talking (rarely).

I do that, because I care about the way you feel when we interact.

This goes for everyone I meet. You can be a hard-knock business ace, you can be an old woman or a 10-year-old kid—fact is: I watch you closely. Which, frankly, can be hard to spot with me talking all over the place.

I do this for a reason. I want you to be comfortable.

One quick example: I suggest a certain type of restaurant I really, really love. Or a movie that we could watch together. Within a second, I can gauge what you're thinking about the idea, and I immediately adjust my position to make you comfortable. I don't say, "we don't have to go there, but…" — no, I suggest other places that I think may be interesting for you. If I pick up some interest for any of them, we'll go there. I want to give you options—why?

Because it gives you a way out. You don't have to confront my suggestion.

For whatever strange reason, so many times, people don't give me a way out. They keep steering me into a direction, firmly, abusing my social diplomacy—a trait demanding me to steer away from being offensive with my comment. It keeps going until I only have two options left: cancel out and shatter your world (you seemed interested?!), or I'll just eat it up and go through with it—even if I don't want to.

I don't understand why people are not picking up those god-damn signals.

It's not that hard, for Christ's sake! I know how much people value their privacy, their comfort, their own plans and friends—I do all in my power to respect this simple requirement of having a nice relationship with someone.

Can't hurt to ask, no? — YES IT CAN. If you're not giving me a nice way out.

As said, I can be really annoying, I can be loud, I can be tireless, I can be boring and I can be awkward to the max in conversations. If we've ever met, this will likely be your opinion of me. But I'm not gonna ask you to do things you are not comfortable with. Even if you've never told me what's comfortable for you, and what is not. And even if I'm wrong so many times, I try my hardest to read those signals. I'm happy, if you feel comfortable.

Those capable of this simple thing, I keep as close as I possibly can.

Those not getting the point of this, I keep at a distance with all my strength.

And that's just really tiring me out sometimes.