On the day of my abuser’s 29th birthday,
His parents write a love note to him on Facebook.

“Happy Birthday,” they write.
“We are so proud of you.”

I wonder if they would be proud
Of the image of him
Assaulting me in my car.

He’d been drunk at the bar.
I told him I’d take him home,
Make sure he got there safe.

I tucked him into my backseat,
Like a baby in a cradle.

And as I got into the driver’s seat,
His arms wrapped around me like constrictors.
Mouth stuck to me like claws.

I couldn’t move.
Couldn’t breathe,
Didn’t want to.

His sister-in-law found us,
Looking to make sure he wasn’t lost.
She apologized for interrupting.

I begged her to stay with us.
Told her I couldn’t bring him home,
But I couldn’t leave him.

She sat down.
She didn’t notice
As he let go.

His new girlfriend always posts
About how good he is to her.
I wonder if he really is
And why he couldn’t be to me.

My favorite book is “The Bell Jar” and if that doesn’t say enough about me then I’m not sure what will.

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