I identify as crazy

Because somehow that takes away your power.

I take ownership of the word,

To do preemptive damage control

Photo by Didssph on Unsplash

I identify as crazy,

Because somehow it explains away my weird actions.

I use the word,

So you can’t hurt me with it.

I use the word crazy,

Because it explains why you walked away.

I claim the word,

To give you an out.

I identify as crazy,

because that means that I don’t have to explain my feelings.

I take the word crazy,

So that I don’t have to face the truth.

I identify as crazy,

Simply because I don’t want to lower my shields.

I use my crazy,

So my reaction to your failure doesn’t have to admit that.

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A lot of times I feel like I label myself as crazy to justify the way I let my emotions take over when they spiral out of control. This has been a thought experiment of trying to reclaim the word and realising that I might have just been using it as a mask.