Five Common Fears

Here, I offer my favorite tip for addressing each of five common fears.

Rejection/Embarrassment. We all want to avoid rejection and embarrassment but do you pay too great a price for avoiding the risk of those? Should you recognize that not only can you survive those but taking reasonable risks offers a legitimate shot at a better life?

Loneliness. First, is it clear the grass will likely be greener? Many people find life better if lived largely solo than in a too-flawed relationship: Better solo than so-so. If you would like to meet a romantic partner or platonic friend, what should you do today, even right now?

Getting fired. If you have your job, do you think you should change your attitude, skillset, something else? If unsure, should you ask your boss or trusted colleague?

Public speaking. Keep it simple. Identify just a few important points that your audience likely doesn’t know. Decide whether a point would benefit from an example, statistic, or anecdote. Conclude with a call to action: In light of your talk, what would you like your audience to do? Often it’s different for different people, so you might conclude with, “Is there one thing you want to do as a result of this talk? Write it down.”

Beginning public speakers might script their talk and then reduce it to reminder words on one index card. Practice while recording it on your phone — How might your audience react to what you’re saying? Perhaps do a run-through for a trusted colleague or friend and ask for honest feedback.

Death and dying — You won’t be any more aware of your death than before your birth. Are you afraid of a difficult dying? Remind yourself that you may well have an early-exit option. For example, many states have already legalized physician-assisted dying.

Is there one thing you want to do in light of this article?

I read this aloud on YouTube

Marty Nemko is a career and personal coach, and author of 34 books including How to Do Life. You can reach Marty at mnemko@comcast.net