After age 50 and especially 60, we may lament our declining memory, admitting that we suffer from CRS: Can’t remember shit. We all know that it helps to write things down but a few tips can help make the most of that writing. Most people will want to use an…

When people learn that my wife and I live in separate homes, the reaction is usually jealousy, incredulity, or both. Their most common questions: Why do you do it? It allows us freedom while retaining connection. It’s the same reason that people date but don’t live together. An ancillary reason…

We’re often urged to practice acceptance, gratitude, and to be in the moment. It’s too easy to accept or to reject those reflexively. To encourage a more reflective decision, here are some pros and cons of each: Acceptance Pros: Acceptance reduces excessive stress and striving. Let’s say you’re afraid of…

As I look back on my 6,000 career counseling clients, I have reluctantly concluded that my efforts could have been better spent. Let me explain. Career counselors mainly do two things: Help people find well-suited careers That is done using some combination of client self-report, counselor questions, assignments to read…

I like being negative, even though the norm is to emphasize the positive, except maybe about Putin or Republicans. Here’s why I tend to be negative. You get to think. We all like to use what we’re naturally good at. I can’t draw nor fix things but I can reason…

First off, are you sure you want to become more likeable? Perhaps you feel you’re already likeable enough. Or maybe you’re not likeable but prefer a fairly solo existence. …

5 ways we fool ourselves into being procrastinators and poor time managers. — We come up with all sorts of excuses to procrastinate, to not worry about time. Here are the five bits of timefoolery that my clients often cop to. “People won’t care much.” True, some people, especially fellow timefools will excuse you. But even with them, if your timefoolery bites you…

10 questions to help you decide — We all want to be people of merit but it’s tough to assess that. It may help to rate yourself on these components of merit. Then review your answers to decide what if anything you want to do to improve. Rate yourself excellent, good, fair, or poor on these: Ethics…

We all aspire to be wise. Using these terms can help. Opportunity cost: If you do X, what can’t you do? For example, if you take a job offer, do you have to turn down other offers or give up recreation or family time? If so, how serious a loss…