Your time

Shit happens in life. All the time. It's usually mundane, sometimes irksome, sometimes joyous, and occasionally tragic. You get through it, sometimes holding on tighter than you wish, and other times you’re delighted by your ability to let go. We face obstacles every day, some we view as purely that, and others we learn from and respect their teachings.

Before i reach full ramble speed, please keep in mind i’m speaking as someone that has been incredibly fortunate with the hand i’ve drawn, and the privilege i’ve been born with. The fact i can use works like “mundane” to describe life’s choices rekes of this. There are of course many that are born with fewer choices they can make, and i want to acknowledge this, but know that what i say below is generally considering myself and others that are fortunate to wake up in the morning and can choose what to do with their day.

I’ve been having some enlightening chats with some very wise souls lately that are helping bring a lot of perspective on each and every moment in this life (thank you!!!). The paths we take, the obstacles we face, its all our own choices, and it's our choices that let us decide how we want to see the shit that happens around / to / for us. How rigorously we decorate our moments with our vision, goals, and intentions helps to remind us that these are all choices, and helps guide the paths we take.

We each occupy physical space on this planet. At some point early on things come into focus, we live our lives, then we die, and the fire is extinguished for the bodies we’ve been choosing to move around for how ever many years we managed to keep breathing. At some point before things come into focus; (usually) a couple people get together and make (some kind of) a choice to light that spark. We’re then here, and we choose where to be present, and then we’re gone and have no more choices to make.

I’ve realized that by being blind to the multitude of choices we do have, it can lead to an entitlement of time.

I recently over rotated whilst listening to the radio and heard someone recount a death that was “before their time”. It is a heartwarming sentiment, and helps to comfort those close and emphasize the injustice of tragedies. But i believe it speaks to a slightly warped view many of us have that we are actually entitled to be here, and live a long and fruitful life.

Shit happens. Shit can come in and take your time away from you at any point, not to mention affecting everyone around you in the same way. The idea that any given moment can be mundane is kind of revolting when i think about every moment being a gift, a blessing, and by no means something i’m entitled to. There is no my time, there is only the present. There may be no future, and where and how you chose to be present in the next moment is always a choice you can make.

Whilst not a hard and fast rule, it seems to me that the degree to which one has gone through trauma / tragedy / adversity, is proportional to how grateful one is for their moments, and how much understanding they have regarding not being entitled to shit. As those close to me that have gone through shit you would never wish can tout, this tradeoff between that shit, and the gift of a heightened sense of presence, while never something you would choose, is infinitely valuable in the end. Perhaps even it's the fact you would never choose it that makes it so. And the more you can recognize there is no entitlement to a life path from point A to point B, the better off you’ll be in any given moment.

So basically, the more i continue to remember i’m not entitled to shit, the deeper i’ll dig, and the more full each moment can be made for me, and for those around me. At least these are the hopes that will decorate my world view, and my choices.

It’s these thoughts that help put a smile on my face, and make me ever more thankful for those spending their present moments with me. I am super stoked for 2018, and can’t wait to make some choices to live it as fully as possible.

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