Point: The point of your video came across clearly as it is about lack of diversity on campus, and how you fit in/are trying to.
Dramatic Question: I don’t think you have a dramatic question but your story takes a dramatic turn when you start describing welcome week.
Emotion: I was really happy for you in the beginning and then you started explaining about the lack of diversity. When you said “white cloud” it really stood out and really made me feel how you are feeling.
Voice: I think you could speak up a little bit in the video. It was kind of muffled in parts. Also you repeat yourself and stutter in some places and I would recommend redoing that. I don’t know if you have physically written out/typed a script, but that can help.
Soundtrack: I liked the music you had playing. It had good rhythm to it and kept me interested. I think it fit well with your topic.
Economy: I think that you could stand to use a few more pictures. The ones you have are great and I really liked the ones you put in about the clubs/communities you joined! I think a few more for other parts like welcome week could be added.
Pacing: Truthfully I think you have it paced out good. It is how you want it. I wouldn’t mess with how you do it because you have pauses in the right places and there doesn’t seem to be any awkwardness besides the parts where you stutter and repeat.
Additional Comments: Overall I liked your video! I think your topic is so cool and interesting because it is something that I don’t really think about and don’t have the perspective on things you do. Keep it up! It’s good!