October 2011, it was love at first sight and a heart attack all in one. I am only twenty four years old, am I sure I am ready for this? But then again we have been awaiting this day for a long time, nine months to be precise, we should be ready, No?
Like most love stories, there’s always a girl who gives a guy heart ache. In my story that girl came as a blessing from God who gave my wife and I this absolutely beautiful, mesmerizingly big eyes, absolutely adorable baby girl. The first time we met, she was just lying there sucking her thumb and staring at me. It was only less than thirty minutes after the delivery but I already felt as if she was my entire world and I was going to beat up anyone who even had a negative thought about her. That’s the heart ache part, will I be enough to protect her and take care of her? We took her home in a tiny little Jetta where my mother in-law barely had room to sit in the from seat because the car seat took up so much space. I felt so inadequate, I barely had a box to take her home in (my imagery of how small my car was).
Fast forward.. she has her own bed, still in our bedroom and is now a big sister. A great big sister, always helping out and taking care of her sister. She loves to write and draw (we have evidence on our walls to prove it) and oh my, she can sing, she makes up her own songs. She is my biggest fan, I could almost never let her down. As soon as I come home and open the door she runs and hugs me or “hides” by lying face down flat on the couch so I can pretend not to find her.
Really really fast forward… with a third child on the way, we decided to give the two sisters their own room with bunk beds. She was so excited to have her own room and sleep on the top bunk that I barely had enough time to put the mattress in before she had her pillow and blanket on it. Two days later she started school and she loves it. She kept talking about taking the “big” school bus to school and meeting all her “friends”. The first day we took her she asked us “when are you leaving?”, she was super excited to be there.
It has been a little over two weeks now that she has started school.. My heart ache hasn’t gone away and everyday I feel it just a bit more and it reminds me that I still have to protect her. Am I ready for this?
This is my first time at attempting to write anything. I have an amazing wife and two beautiful girls, a two year old and four year old and another baby on the way. I wrote about my eldest in this and I also plan to write about my two year old. I work in tech and my wife manages the house. With that said my writing may not be as good as most people but I plan to use it as an outlet and as a way to practice and get better. Thank you for reading. -MZ