Look In the Mirror
(NOT to be confused with the selfie [stick])
I am sitting down to type this post — really as a way to share my voice — which, sadly, is not something that always comes natural to me. I am one of those middle of the road people. Like one of my favorite quotes, “everything in moderation, including moderation”. Striving to be liked by everyone. A desire to improve the world/corrupt industries, but also wanting to dance and play and be with my family and travel.
Every now and then, you gotta spill the beans. So here it is. Lately, I find that so often I am complexed by the world we live in. Beyond incredible and revolutionized in so many ways, yet on the other hand there is so much suffering and emphasis on negativity — with very little positive action. Social media has made this even easier and accessible. Narcissism is brought to a whole new level. When we need to take a look in the mirror now more than ever, we continue to take selfies and avoid any discomfort or real self-reflection. What work is done in self-reflection is minimal at best, or justification for choosing to continue to live in that suffering, fear and judgement.
Warning, going off on a tangent…Working out in a gym a zillion hours to look a certain way, may be considered self-wellness and in some ways it is, but don’t fool yourself. It’s just another avenue to avoid the real work: true self-discovery and innermost wellness. In fact, the way our fitness industry has gone — less intellectual/emotional/psychological work, more focus on how you physically appear — it becomes a “never enough” mentality and everyone is walking around with injuries…for what? It’s a slippery slope. What could be a transformative experience physically, physiologically AND neurologically has become another self-promoting, selfie-taking, sometimes very exclusive (and expensive) industry.
I recently watched a documentary and there was a woman that spoke a simple truth: many people are asleep.
I am five months post ACL reconstruction — a lengthy recovery period — and the questions I get asked the most — “Soooo…what do you do with yourself?” “What do you do all day?”, many more along those lines, but you get what I mean. Seriously. It’s very easy for me to slip into our societal norm and start asking myself, “Gosh, what do I do with my days? Am I doing enough? Am I useless, I have nothing to show for this time. I need to be constantly busy”. Well, the reality is that my answer is pretty simple, yet so profound: Being. And, that is enough. In fact, that is the hardest work there is. I am not avoiding. I am not valuing myself based on how busy I am, what acheivements or titles I hold or how I physically look. I am also not living in fear of what’s to come — rather, I am practicing living in the moment. Being kind to myself. Learning about myself. Pushing through discomfort rather than avoiding it. Being curious. And, exploring why I do what I do — why I do anything, really. What I eat and put into my body. What is the environmental impact of my habits and choices. Man, it is HARD work. You become more selective about the information you take in and put out, as well as the people you surround yourself with. It is also incredible growth and I can already see that this journey becomes one of intention and joy and gratitude, just to name a few. The beginning of a world and a life we all deep down, truly want to experience.
Ask yourself, what do the negative comments, posts, shares on social media do anyway? Do they make anything better?
What makes this world better? By raising your own personal standards. By becoming more aware. Once you realize your suffering is self-induced by your own thoughts and closed heart, you will transform your life, your relationships and the world.
Why is this so difficult? It is such a personal thing. It cannot be forced. It has to come from each of us individually, at the right time. And, it is much easier to take in and expel the negative, it’s everywhere. It’s a downward spiral. It takes a lot of work and awareness to get out of it. In this route you THINK you’re avoiding the pain and discomfort when in reality it is prolonging what is necessary to live a more meaningful life and ultimately, create the world we all want to live in.
I am in the business of feeling alive and embracing change. Put those selfie sticks down and wake up with me.
Delve in and be the change you want to see. Question why you do what you do. Heal your suffering. Stop clinging to life: the past and the future and live in the NOW. Things happen, politicians get elected, and rather than promoting rage — be the change. Value yourself, beyond your physical appearance. Welcome the discomfort and resistance and push through it. Feel the freedom and the empowerment that eventually flows in.
In the words of Michael A. Singer, in the book the untethered soul, “How you deal with your energy flow has a major effect on your life. If you assert your will against the energy of an event that has already happened, it is like trying to stop the ripples caused by a leaf dropped into a still lake. Anything you do causes more disturbance, not less. When you resist, the energy has no place to go. It gets stuck in your psyche and seriously affects you — causing you to feel closed and less vibrant.
The alternative is to use life to let go of these impressions and the stress they create. In order to do this you have to become very conscious. You will be surprised to find in that in most situations there’s nothing to deal with except for your own fears and desires. Fear and desire make everything seem so complicated. If you don’t have fear or desire about an event, there’s really nothing to deal with. You simply allow life to unfold and interact with it in a natural and rational manner. When the next things happens, you’re fully present in that moment and simply enjoying the experience of life.
Stop and think about what you’re capable of achieving. Up to now, your capacities have been constrained by constant inner struggles. Imagine what would happen if your awareness was free to focus only on the events actually taking place. You would have no noise going on inside. If you lived like this, you could do anything. Your capabilities would be exponential compared to what you’ve ever experienced. If you could bring this level of awareness and clarity to everything you do, your life would change.”
(HIGHLY recommend this book).
If you want the world to change, be the change. Promote real love over narcissism. Put down the selfie stick and actually look in the mirror.