Having It All Kinda Sucks
amywestervelt
2.8K263

I completely love this piece. Thank you for so pointedly and eloquently stating what I’ve been thinking and feeling and shouting for years. As the child of a Boomer, I have always admired that my mother wanted to work and made her identity primarily a “working woman”. However, in the past, I have also resented being raised as a latch-key kid, thus judging my own mother for choosing to “have it all” in her life. Having it all for her meant sacrificing a relationship with her child, as she worked long hours away from home, ultimately becoming a VP in a corporate institution. Women have been the harshest critics of women across the ages, and as you pointed out, we often judge ourselves because we feel we aren’t keeping up with what we perceive other women’s expectations are of us regarding how we juggle it all.

I started a business and raised three children while being completely immersed in community service and our children’s school, with some participation from my husband. I never thought I was doing enough. Now, at 47, after I’ve raised them all and gotten our last great kid out of college, I really don’t give a shyte what other women or anyone else thinks about how I did it! I feel great about it all.

I wish you well and much respect as you work through your days as hard as you do. I hope that ‘having it all’ will come to include having more and more personal moments filled with comforts that make your life abundantly joyful.

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