My #MomTruth: “There is no work life balance”

Monica Royer
Aug 28, 2017 · 2 min read

I watched from the sideline as my brother launched Bonobos. I often wondered to myself how he could stand for hours on end emailing and who in the world was he emailing all that time? Also, how could emailing take all day? I would miss his call only to call him back two minutes later and he was already off on another phone call. I remember thinking how could anyone be that busy? I now know how.

I suddenly feel as though I’ve jumped into another void. A universe where time is no longer my own. Where the hours between 5am and 5pm feel like a flash of five minutes. Where every spare minute of every day (both waking and sleeping) is all consumed by the brand. The brand becomes your life. And yet, I also have a daughter. I have to balance spending time with her and making sure she knows she is my number one priority. My solution thus far has been to have her with me as much as I can — the office, travel, and everywhere in between. I am the mom sitting outside tennis, piano, and ballet feverishly working on my computer and taking calls on my phone. The other moms probably wondering what is wrong with me. My hope is that by picking her up and dropping her off I can be there for all that she needs in those in between moments. I try to make my work trips fun for her. We learn about the different cities we visit. And my office is her second home.

I am so thankful for my parents. They have helped and supported me every step of the way. Stepping in when I can’t be at pick up or at home. Always gently reminding me that my biggest job in life is not the brand, but her. My husband is also very supportive, but he has the same job as I do. How foolish for us both to be entrepreneurs. And even though we don’t get to spend the time together that we want, we understand each other so well because we share in the same responsibility. To our daughter. To our brands. The same struggles.

I have come to believe that you can’t have it all. For me a relaxing dinner and socializing with friends is a luxury. Instead I take snuggles from my little lady and I hop back on my computer after she goes to sleep. And sleep for me? I catch up on the weekends.

But to be part of this new generation of moms who make things happen is everything to me. I am inspired daily by the amazing women around me and the shit they get done between 6 am and 10 pm. There is no work life balance. They are not separate entities. For me, worklife is one word.

And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

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