3 Proven Methods to Overcome Self-Doubt — The Story of a Teacher

How to fight your insecurities and promote healthy self-reflection.

I remember my first day as an English teacher as if it were yesterday. Believe me, it was an emotional rollercoaster! I’d been dreaming of becoming a teacher since I was a little kid. But on that morning before my first class, I felt paralyzed with self-doubt. I stood in front of the class, sweating buckets. I was about to mess it all up and disappoint my students, my family, and the little version of me who always wanted to become an inspiring teacher.

But:

Once I introduced myself to the class, things started to click. Students actively participated in the activities I prepared and even laughed at my stupid jokes. With each minute passing, my confidence was growing. By the end of the lesson, I knew that teaching, indeed, was my calling. Now, over a year later, I’ve learned to trust my abilities. I love my students, and they love me, and I won’t allow my insecurities to ruin this.

My Experience of Self-Doubt

I believe many of us have experienced self-doubt at some point in our lives, but have you ever dug deep to explore what it actually is?

Simply put, it is a feeling of uncertainty about your abilities, beliefs, opinions, and even overall worth.

Whenever my insecurities creep in, basic tasks become impossible challenges, and decisions feel paralyzing. So, it is essential to identify if the lack of confidence gets in the way.

To do that at an early stage, I usually ask myself these questions:

• Am I second-guessing my abilities or decisions?
• Do I feel insecure about my skills or knowledge?
• Do I expect the results to be disappointing, no matter how much effort I put in?

These questions help me stop for a second and realize how much I underestimate myself and how many of these doubts might be justified.

To be fair:

Sometimes my indecisiveness has been beneficial. For example, when choosing a college, I questioned my decisions a lot. I spent countless hours researching and comparing different schools, eventually making the right choice. That’s how my self-doubt taught me to set realistic goals and not take on more than I can handle.

However, there’s always a risk of losing control of your insecurities and ending up with low self-esteem or imposter syndrome. So what can we do about it?

Can It Be Healthy?

In small doses, self-criticism can remind you that you don’t have to be perfect. Now that I’ve learned how to manage my inner critic, I use it as a tool to help me realize when I’m wrong. Not only did I become more curious and open to alternative opinions, but also a better listener and a more empathetic person (to myself, in the first place).

Unfortunately, it’s way more common when self-doubt becomes a chronic state and doesn’t allow you to see the good in yourself. It is like a greedy parasite that consumes more and more of you, making it difficult to stay motivated. You may even believe you’re unworthy and will never achieve your goals.

Then, how do you maintain a healthy level of self-criticism?

How I Pulled Myself Out of Doubt Pit

My self-doubt really crept in when I had just graduated with a master’s degree and got my first job as a teacher at a hometown school. Even though this opportunity was a dream come true, it felt like a nightmare. I spent days writing and rewriting lesson plans, trying to anticipate every challenge that might arise.

Yet:

I couldn’t shake the feeling that my lessons weren’t good enough or I wasn’t.

I remember running into my friend Sarah, also a newbie teacher, who seemed so chill and confident of herself and her abilities. I couldn’t help but compare myself to her and felt even worse. At that moment, I realized I needed to work on how I perceive myself and not let insecurities sabotage my success.

Overcoming my self-doubt was a journey that required a lot of time and self-reflection. I tried various strategies, like daily affirmations, seeking approval from colleagues, and more. Unfortunately, some methods didn’t seem to make any impact.

While self-doubt still kicks in sometimes, these three practices helped me take control over my thoughts.

1. Escaping from the Limiting Beliefs

The first thing I recommend paying attention to is your negative self-talk. Thoughts like “I’m too young to be a teacher” or “I’m not a good role model for my students” used to occupy my mind. None of it was true; they simply emerged from my fear of failure.

Here is what I did to stop this negative thinking:

I. I identified my limiting beliefs and wrote them down. It was easier to start with the largest one and then add less apparent thoughts that crossed my mind.

II. I asked myself questions to challenge those negative opinions and prove they were not facts.
I questioned:

• Do I always think this way?
• Is there evidence disproving these beliefs?
• What would I tell my friends if they had similar negative perceptions of themselves?

III. I recognized the potential consequences of negative self-talk and that holding on to it could stop me from starting my dream job.

IV. I made a list of empowering beliefs. Earlier, I used to worry about my young age, but now I realize it would allow me to understand my students better. Of course, some thoughts weren’t that easy to transform as they were rooted too deeply.

2. Regulating Your Self-Talk

Because of all the limiting beliefs, I formed a solid negative self-talk habit. I was saying mean things and criticizing myself heavily, something I would have never done to a close person. Negative self-talk was like having a little voice in my head, saying that my lesson plans were boring, my outfit ugly, and my knowledge was not deep enough.

To stop this cycle of negative self-talk, I thought about the origin of these harmful thoughts. Most of them were rooted in my childhood. I grew up in an environment where my parents constantly pushed me to succeed in everything I did: studies or extracurricular activities. While they had good intentions, their focus on achievement often made me feel like I was never good enough.

As I grew older, I realized that others’ opinions or external achievements did not define my worth.

I’m learning to be kinder to myself and embrace imperfections as part of what makes me unique. While I used to fear failure and disappointing my parents, I now see mistakes as a motivation to keep trying until I reach my goal.

3. Journaling

As a child, I used to have a diary, but I’ve never realized the therapeutic benefits it has for adults. A diary is not just a safe space for your thoughts and experiences; it can also help identify triggers and self-flagellation. Some studies say that journaling can even help manage anxiety and depression symptoms.

I used to keep all the negative thoughts inside not to burden my friends. Of course, this internalization of emotions led to more stress and self-doubt. I feel so much better now that I can release all my concerns onto the page. You don’t have to invest much time or be a skilled writer to experience the benefits of journaling. I spend 15–20 minutes daily writing before bed.

If you don’t know where to start journaling,

I recommend checking out some prompts:

• How are you feeling now?
• What are things you are grateful for today?
• What’s the biggest challenge you’re facing right now?
• How can you work through this?

Overcoming self-doubt is not a quick fix but a long journey requiring patience and self-compassion. The above-described methods were the most helpful for me, though you might use other strategies. Stay tuned for the next article, where I list other ways of fighting self-doubt and explain how to integrate them into your life.

Lessons Learned

So, I’ve been successfully teaching for over a year now, but I still cannot forget how my heart was racing before my first lesson. On overcoming my insecurities, I’ve learned to handle those negative thoughts and not let them take control of my routine.

But let me tell you:

There are still times when insecurities paralyze me. It’s like a never-ending battle, but every time I fight it off, I feel stronger. This challenging journey taught me the importance of deep self-analysis.

To finish my story, I want you to take time and also reflect on whether you have unhealthy self-beliefs and where they came from.

Let’s take this first step towards taking control of your mindset — reflect on whether these might be the causes of your unhealthy insecurities.

• Past Experience. I was surprised to learn how closely past traumas and self-doubt are connected. When we feel emotions experienced during traumatic situations, the brain signals our bodies that we’re in danger. If it happens regularly, we get lower self-esteem, which is the perfect fuel for self-doubting.
• Perfectionism. Striving for perfection can also cause harmful inner criticism. I used to believe all my past accomplishments were just lucky breaks and ignored my actual skills. At the same time, I was setting extremely high standards that were impossible to meet. This hyper-focus on my failures led to a cycle where I never felt worthy enough.
• Overthinking. When you overthink, you make small problems seem much bigger than they are. It can prevent you from making decisions and taking any actions as you become overwhelmed by the fear. This indecisiveness further feeds into your self-doubt as you second-guess your abilities.