10 Reasons why I am no longer a feminist.
Confessions of how the ‘the red pill’ killed my socialism and my feminism.
- Too Much Emotional Labor
I used to be a hippy. I smelled ‘fresh’, but I always believed and endorsed feminist freedoms. I thought the patriarchy was evil. I even marched in slut walks, women’s marches, you name it. I even actively protested men’s rights events.
I thought traditional signs of “ATTRACTION” were merely social constructs, and beauty standards? they were stupid, vapid and one dimensional. So I went through many years of making super loving sex with pretty much everyone. Even a couple dudes as a straight man. I was poly. Always open, honest, and always endorsing sexual liberation.
The earliest signs of my anti-feminism, however, started from the critique of a book by the radical left: “Preliminary Materials for a Theory of the Young-Girl” … crudely put, and this is my retroactive interpretation from many years later, the anonymous writers basically criticize how the modern woman is on the front lines of present-day “post”-colonial and capitalist exploitation. I thought the book was on point, but the feminists responded with vague criticisms, even going so far as to call the work misogynistic, regardless of the fact that the group had many women in it. They did not have a clear critique of the book. They were just a bandwagon. I never understood this.
I wondered why so little feminists were acquainted with the work of Hannah Arendt, who talks about the hollowing of the public sphere. I guess now that there is a good reason why Arendt is not considered a feminist.
The thing is, one of the greatest feminist thinkers, that chick who killed Andy Warhol, she said it best: the world is shit because of “daddy’s girls” (Ivanka).
Another early sign of my anti-feminism came after I was astounded by a debate with a classmate, who explained that it is “too much emotional labor” to educate people. “But isn’t that the point?” I thought. Isn’t the very point of the existence of the ‘public sphere’ to give undue energy to a slow and boring democratic process? Isn’t that what democratic deliberation was all about? Isn’t complaining about excessive emotional labor the absolute epitome of being in an overly-privileged position?
“No but, I guess women do already too much emotional labor in other spheres, and it is my duty as a feminist man, must make other men realize their privilege” I would rationalize.
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2. Feminist Complicity
As I grew older, I realized that sex can be an addiction. I analogize it to other addictions. Sex for men is like cocaine — good quality is hard to get / pricey, but once you get it, your going to have a great night. And you will probably run out of money before you get addicted.
Sex for women on the other hand? It is like crack. Easy to get, easy to keep getting, readily available.
I realized that all the ‘quality’ women I have dated over the years, in terms of both physical beauty and mental health, had actually very low numbers of past sexual partners. Women who did not, pretty much ALWAYS had some mental issue, and I became more aware of this over time.
Women who sleep around are pretty much like crackhead adrenaline junkies, and in our tinder culture, I slowly started realizing that it was just too much emotional labor to date such people…
At some point, I started realizing that the jobs I have had were never really prestigious enough for the women I was dating. It was living a fine life only to start absorbing the “status anxiety” of the WOMEN around me. It never came from men.
After talking to some classy lady at a bar, great laughs etc. I realize that once she noticed my shoes, her whole demeanor towards me changed. I became a nobody in an instant.
In contrast, once I was gifted a 1000 dollar watch from my extended family. I wore it a couple times and realized that the classy ladies at the bar would now look at me, and the watch, as if they were predators. The “THING” would give me such status from thin air. WTF? Is this what women are like outside of college?
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3. The sheer number of Women who voted for the Puxxy Grabber
At some point during this narrative, Trump got voted in, and like many others, I was in a state of disbelief regarding the number of women who voted for a puxxy grabber. This is when I truly started becoming exposed to the red pill ideas — through endless debate with conservatives online…
The main thing was, I would take these ideas back into my feminist communities, in order so that they can be broken down. But they banned me from their tribe. I was excluded. I was no longer allowed in. (not to mention the dozens of times I have been called out, this was a normal thing in our cult, being open to being called out was a sign you were progressive).
I needed their help to try and dismantle these ideas but I was shunned.
And this started to solidify my newly found anti-identity politic.
When I would retroactively think about my relatively successful sex/relationship life, I started to realize that I WAS ALWAYS an ‘emotional tampon’ for alpha widows. Not only this, but when we would eventually break up, the women I was with always ended up with a guy much taller/richer than I. The ‘Red pill’ was retroactively confirming my experiences; and it had become a lens, to see my future relationships. Unfortunately, now I cannot unsee this lense.
I started to realize that the asian feminists around me would for some reason only date white guys. hmm.
All the feminists in college, it was very interesting to see the type of guys they ended up with later on. hmmm.
Then I had slowly come to the conclusion that Feminists and incels are both against “the patriarchy,” but only one group is able to admit their complicity.
It is very simple really. The patriarchy only exists because women choose patriarchs. Including the feminists.
Socialist feminists, in their socialism, were always quick to point out the problem with SCABS, but… they would never extend this analysis to their dating life.
But Friedrich Engels was wrong. Women aren’t hypergamous/golddiggers BECAUSE of the patriarchy, they do this DESPITE the patriarchy.
Feminists look at the equation in an inverted manner, when they say how ending capitalism wont end patriarchy.
The biggest bell hooks lie: The patriarchy was never upholding capitalism; in fact, the patriarchy is a space that defends the home from endless capitalist cost/benefit analyses. The feminists, in their privileged complaints about emotional labor, aided in turning all aspects of our lives into an emotional labor calculation. The final step into ‘late stage capitalism’ could not have happened without female CEOs and metoo.
the feminists killed the patriarchy, and now there is no way to defend the home from these calculations... And now single motherhood alpha widows and their beta step dads are the new normal family.
Feminists thought that they were arguing that the PERSONAL IS POLITICAL when in reality, they were necessary step into making the PERSONAL into PURE CAPITAL.
Foucault realized this when he analyzed what was going on during the Iranian revolution. The clerics were pissed that capitalism was changing the social structure, and how women selling their bodies had become the new norm.
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4. Is Sex Work actually valid?
A whole moral paradigm based on autonomy and consent, sounds pretty much like a libertarian position.
If you think sex work is a valid profession, please ask yourself these three questions:
- Since sex-work is a valid profession, should we be taking steps to protect consumers and producers, as we do for example in the massage industry, with accreditation programs?
- Since sex-work is a valid profession, should we allow this profession to be popularized by teachers, given out as valid results on high school career tests to 16 year olds? Should their be a booth at career fairs?
- Since sex-work is a valid profession, should it be taxed? Perhaps such a tax can go into the accreditation programs that would indeed help with the safety of the profession as stipulated in question 1.
It is funny that sex work is valid only when it is not a metoo case.
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5. Feminist Colonialism
Have you ever studied about the feminists who are destroying ancient cultures around the world by insisting on people changing their traditions?
It’s utterly insane to go into a different world view, and try to impose western ideas of individual autonomy and enlightenment ideas.
Without feminism, we would not be able to continue a contemporary colonial project of “civilizing” barbarians.
One of the reasons why we went to war in Iraq, was to save oppressed colored women.
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7. Only taller guys chill these days.
When you go out, do you see any short guys hanging out anymore?
There used to be more. Now, because feminists couldn’t reflect their criticism of society back on themselves, and to admit their complicity in the system, these sorts of people are now all hikikomori.
It seems fairly simple to me why the patriarchy exists from the perspective of sexual selection; women want the best guys, so guys become super competitive, intense capitalists, (ie ‘the patriarchs’). After feminist activism however, ‘the patriarchs’ of today however, also need to also have some ‘emotional intelligence’ (along of course, with the un/conscious bias of being white, tall, and a job that pays more than the woman in the relationship, regardless of how much she is making) .
but they killed the political sphere by shunning people. they mess with the process. except they do not realize that this is the same playbook that the conservatives have, just as we saw with trumps acquittal. when you fuck with the process, the conservatives win because they got the money!
when you play an endless game of identity politics, white people will win!
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8. Metoo as endless Vicarious Trauma
The last early sign was a study about how women who have been raped prefer dating muscular men. I would later extrapolate and extend this thesis: where the whole world must bend down to the insatiable insecurities of women scaring each other about walking home at night, while the veiled boasting about men hitting on them would slowly turn into endless complaints, a spreading of a vicarious traumatization. Amass hysteria of Stockholm syndrome, something that the feminists never took
Even if I was to give some leeway to naive people who for some reason only have agency at opportune moments, moments that reflect the feminist narrative,with my new red pill glasses, it has become impossible to sympathize with the golddiggers who start legal battles against the people who made them rich and famous.
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9. Endless Therapy Culture
Most who are well read, will read this and criticize me for subsuming neoliberal feminism for feminism itself. Not only am I so tired of the last true Scotsman fallacy that feminism always resorts to, ( No, those aren’t feminists, they are TERFS. No, they are not included.).. but every form of feminism promotes individualization and neoliberalism through therapy culture..
Who gets to decide?
It is so obvious, that the new ideological position backed by an endlessly self-referential list of citations, that the APA has been compromised. I can refer to Shawn T Smith’s war on masculinity.
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10. A time of “Cold Intimacy”
So now I am with a girl, and after another great night, hours of great sex and loving cuddles, we start talking about our past experiences.
I reveal my crazy life and she reveals her history, which i was okay with, until she mentioned a gang bang… then things get emotional and she cries on my chest saying how great it is to be with me and how I am not like the other guys.
In my head, however, I am making my escape plan. its unfortunate that in this day and age, these type of people are really prevalent. ‘Cold intimacy’ is all that I am able to muster in a media saturated by instahoes.
months ago I had decided that I would stop being an emotional tampon for alpha widows.
So these days, I do just that. I build trust only for her to reveal her true self, which usually takes months. For her to reveal the truth about her past.
This is the only way to survive in our desert of social status zombies.
Now in addition to my daily supplements, everyday I make sure to swallow what I see as a very healthy red pill.
Its crazy how I use BOTH feminist AND red pill terminology.
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So, “Why does the patriarchy persist?” (Title of a recent book)
I can answer this.
After the humiliating defeat of peterson by the hands of Zizek, I thought maybe my redpill ideas would dissolve. But no, Zizek is always a target of feminst hysteria.
Zizek said it best, “people” dont fall in love anymore, they make calculated risks.
Female sexual selection, and the accompanying high brow inability to realize this complicity, is the reason why the patriarchy persists.
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BONUS: 11) #BelieveWarren
I only started calling myself a bernie bro after this incident. Believe warren when she is obviously using identity politic to get some minuscule gains. If a “highly respected” and backed woman with so much credibility uses identity politics in this way, then what can we say for the mass of normies?
Yes, I will still vote for Bernie, but no way I will cry if Trump gets into office again. I am prepared for both. Bring it.
