Three days ago I had my last psychotherapy session. I made it. I healed. I am not depressed anymore. It is not about being happy. It is about knowing that nothing can make me THAT unhappy anymore.
I grew up and now I feel I am ready to face life like never before. I feel strong and solid. Problems and issues may come and I am not afraid, for I will face them with the consciousness of being strong enough to overcome them. I can hold and sustain myself. I know how to face an unknow situation. I am brave enough to risk now. I know my value, regardless the way people may see me.
My therapist has been a blessing, a life teacher for me. She has shown me how biased I was in some things and helped me change my behavior. She did not cure the sympthoms, she annihilated the primary causes.
I learnt a few important things in the last 20 Months:
1 . I am the only one responsible for my well being. Nobody else is. My first task is to protect my self and do whatever it takes to protect myself.
The same holds for other people: they are responsible for themselves, not me. I do not have the resposibility to make anybody happy but myself.
2 . Who attacks me must expect me to defend myself and counterattack. Up to now I was always keeping quite when offended because I did not like offenses. This resulted in people offending me even more. Now I shoot back, as powerfully as I can.
3 . I am fine not having anchors in my life. I am my own anchor. I am the source of my psychological stability and I am fine losing people I love. For sure it hurts but I can survive it.
4 . Nobody has the right to talk trash of me. Nobody has the right, whatever the level of anger, to offend me. Nobody has the right to degrade me or diminsh my accomplishments. Nobody is entitled to define my worth. I am worth basic respect let alone because I am a living being.
5 . When I have to take a decision I do not need to be afraid. I just need to think about the possible consequences, prepare myself and take the decision serenily.
6 . Not everybody needs to like me and I do not need to like and get along with everybody. It is ok not to like and not to be liked. This has no influence on my worth.
With dedication and commitment I made it. I am ready for life now.