Being an Oilfield Wife
Have you ever heard “If it was easy everybody would do it.” that is how it is being an oilfield wife. The number question I get asked is “How do you do it?”. My response is always “How do you not?”. It really does take a strong person to handle it mentally. This is all I have known for eleven years. Has it been easy? Not at all.
In 2012 my husband started his career in the oilfield. We were dating at the time and building us a tiny house. In the beginning I worked, but when he came home I hated to leave him because he had been gone for two weeks. After a few months we decided I would stay home and attending school. At the time this sounded like a great plan. However when he would leave to go to work, depression would creep in. The walls at home started feeling like they were closing in on me. All my friends had moved off to attend college. The only person I had was my husband and he was gone for fourteen days at a time.
When he was home life was great. I would stay up waiting on his return. We kept busy doing chores around the house and being together. No matter what the fourteen days home always seem to fly by. As the day approached for him to head back to work. I would draw into depression. His break lights would glow bright red as he pulled out of the driveway and my heart would rip open. The tears would flow. Depression would make its way back.
Of course my mind would go into overdrive. Every negative thought would reside in my mind. All the “what-ifs” cheating, lying, talking, to someone else. These thoughts would consume me. Then I would start building walls around my heart for protection. I distant myself. The depression kept growing and growing. Soon enough I found myself in a very bad spot mentally. I decided I had to go back to work. I had to be around people.
I landed me a job at an attorneys office and soon my heart would feel full again. These ladies became like family to me. I worked there for two years. All the way up to I gave birth to our daughter. In 2016 I became a stay at home mom. This time though being at home was a blessing. Having a new born baby, sure kept my mind off things. For awhile anyway… Soon my thoughts went to envy. My husband got to go off to work and I stayed home all the time. I began to resent him.
Once these feeling creeped in I knew I had to take control. Sure enough God would send me just the person I needed. Ms. Bonnie. What a blessing this lady is to me! She helped me through each emotion and thought that came to reside in my mind. She taught me how to stand up and take these thoughts captive. Bonnie showed me how Lee is the provider. She pointed out details that I never seen because my mind was blinded by all the negative.
I have learned to embrace each moment with our daughter. I have taken control over my mind. I no longer allow my mind to go into overdrive. I have learned to get to the top, you have to make sacrifices. So as my husband works his way to success for us. I tend to our daughter and our real estate business.
Being an oilfield wife is not easy. It takes a strong, secure, and trusting women. Someone I wasn’t in the beginning. Each hitch built me to the women I am today. I have learned to be a partner and not a ally. The oilfield is all we know. Its our life.
I say all of this to say…Accept where you are in life. Do try to fight it. Do not try to force anything. Embrace it. After all it is just for a season.
