I Shave my Legs, Wear Makeup, Want a Family, and Am a Feminist

What do you think when you hear the word “feminist”? A woman with a butch haircut, unshaven armpits, and an armband tattoo? Perhaps you see a pantsuit wearing, career driven divorcée.

I think many of us know these are obvious feminist stereotypes, but I also think this is what we still envision when the F-word is dropped in conversation. The stigma attached to the word brings up images of bra burning hippies of the 60s or power suits and big hair of the 90s.

In fact, it took a long time for me to call myself a feminist (sorry Mom!). However, when I really started to look at what feminism was — the belief that women should have equal rights and treatment as men — I realized that I absolutely was a feminist. Why shouldn’t I get paid the same or have the same career opportunities if I had the same skills? Why shouldn’t I be able to decide on the career of my choosing or no career at all?

If you believe men and women should have the same rights and opportunities, then you are, in fact, a feminist — male or female. In the same breath, however, we must also understand that at the very root of feminism (humanism?), women also have the right to express their feminist ideals in whichever way fits what they want out of life. Is that a fair statement?

I think part of the reason I waited so long to admit I was a feminist is because I didn’t feel I was feminist enough. Meaning, I wanted a career, but maybe I would want to stay at home once I had children. I wanted to be married and have my husband show leadership in the household. I love getting “dolled-up” and feeling pretty. I feel gross when my armpit hair is too long. And, for the love of it, I love wearing a good-fitting bra.

Believe me, I have strong opinions and I have no qualms about sharing them, but I enjoy my femininity. Men and women are different in so many ways and that’s okay. So I think it’s really important to respect the personal views and opinions other women have for their lives. Just because a woman prefers to stay at home and have her husband work does not mean she is less of a feminist than a woman who chooses to have a career. The whole point of feminism is to give each woman the right to choose her path and be respected for it.