Urban legends in the year 2116

No One
6 min readJul 6, 2016

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All of us have read various urban legends and myths, passed down since generations. While most of them are senseless, almost all of them are fun to read. I was wondering what would urban legends look like, say, hundreds of year from today. So it is the year, 2116, and if my future version made a small list of the craziest urban legends, this is what it would resemble:

AB DeVilliers — Still as cool as Ice!

This one says that ABD’s body has been kept cryogenically frozen in the hope that science can revive the lost art of batting through his genes. Regarded as the perfect batsman for all situations, ABD passed away in 2034, but stories are afloat that his body has been preserved for his perfect sporting genes. — Now, that would definitely be the batsman of a lifetime!

Party and Alcohol

Legend has it, that the rise of the famous “alcohol & party song phase” in India ran parallel to Modi coming into power as the PM of India. This was a large-scale secret conspiracy to drive propaganda for alcohol across India, including Gujarat. Many say that the party song fad brought about a cultural revolution, making it easy for Modi to change the “dry state” policy of Gujarat and allowing sale of alcohol in his backyard. — Even if true, I am glad this failed. Else vodka-flavored pani puri outside college would be the rage amongst drunk college girls

Messi is an alien!

Legend has it that the global heartthrob and ace soccer player was actually an alien. This theory grew popular due to his near perfect and inhumane skills on the field, analysed and scrutinized after his demise. There are lots of videos claiming to show a study of Messi’s skull and peculiar bone-structure, leading people to believe that he was actually not a homo sapien by structure. Of course, critics say these videos have no iota of truth and are not backed by any Government institute. Just to add logic to this theory, supporters say, Messi was actually an alien and smart enough to underperform at crunch situations, so as to come across human; not blowing his cover. — The ball is in your court on this one!

Valar Dohaeris & Morghulis — All men lived and died

This one, probably the most bizarre and obviously fictional legend tells us that all the stories, characters and events mentioned in the books, A Song Of Ice And Fire, did actually take place ages ago. An obvious mass-effort by fans to keep the era alive in the minds of generations to come, this can be ticked off because of records of the characters tracing no later than when GRR Martin wrote them. The fact that fans all over the world, for years to come, kept coming up with obscure proof to back this claim, has kept this legend popular and hence on this list. — Any such story on Harry Potter? No? Sure? Well..

Snapdiluminati

Opinion is divided on this one, since this involved finance and not everybody understands it. This one can be traced back to mid 2020s, when the e-commerce became huge in majority of the countries, growing by leaps in less than 10 years. Hundreds of financial experts and business critics claim that the e-commerce companies, funded by wealthy individuals were controlled by a select group of world-leaders, otherwise known as Illuminati. The end-goal of the e-commerce companies was to create a huge demand of heavily-discounted products, thereby creating a huge hollow space in world economy. While the drastic imbalance in the economy has been persistent and there for all of us to see today, whether or not this is another phenomenon linked with the Illuminati is up for delicious debate. — This is amazon stuff, really!

Snapchat — The Thirteenth

So this one is rather cliched and no one knows when and where this started. Apparently, the 13th contact on your snapchat list will turn your enemy in real life if you don’t block them. — I’m thinking, there will always be someone who will be contact 13, make sure it is not the girl/guy you are eyeing.

Back to the future

Years after 2016, when BRexit happened, a popular story started doing the rounds. It claimed that Brexit was actually a conspiracy by the British Government to try and make itself independent of not just the EU, but the world order!! Doesn’t make sense? Read on — This was the 1st of several steps planned by the British Government to go become a totally independent entity and start colonising the areas around, just like they did long back in time. — So British, so foolish. God save the queen!

Facebook buys Instagram and and your life!

People across the world swear that when Facebook bought Instagram, it was a major social media revolution. The same people claim that this was done with a sole intention in mind. It is said that after this, Facebook started filming every phone user with a FB or IG app 24*7 via the phone camera. — Now that is one scary thought. Facebook goes Truman Show on the entire world!

Cat you in the next life

The cats in all the selfies, on their death, are reborn as human beings in nearby areas; places close to where the selfie was taken. They end up unknowingly at or around the spot where all their selfies were taken in previous life. There are no recorded reports of people claiming to be specific cats from images, but there are many who claim to have been cats in previous lives. — All this and I’m just thinking if the concept of nine lives of a cat comes into play here or not?

All the content & ideas written here are purely fictional, meant to amuse. No offense to be taken on account of this piece.

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No One

Keen listener & observer of people; I am eccentric, but just. I think intelligence is awesome, but a sense of humor comes first.