Rules for Living 1-10

Practical lessons about the human condition.

  1. Sweat at least once a day. Your ancestors were once hunters and gatherers, farmers and peasants. They worked for their food. We weren’t designed to poach our prey at a fast food drive-thru. So get off your ass and let your pores rain glorious sweat. It’s how we were built.
  2. Never let a large group of really high people get ahead of you in line at the liquor store. Chances are, if you’re at a liquor store, you probably need whatever you’re going to buy now.
  3. Majority opinion and the truth are not synonymous. It’s entirely possible for a lot of people to be wrong about a lot of things.
  4. Nothing you read in a self-help book is going to help you.
  5. Eliminate “someday” from your vocabulary. “Someday” doesn’t exist. “Someday” never comes. If you wait around for it, you’re going to waste years of your life expecting something to happen. Something won’t. Replace “someday” with “today.”
  6. As much as it pains us to admit it, life is trial and error. It is a collection of various screw-ups and mishaps, littered with broken promises and what-could-have-beens and stitched together with love, hope and dreams. Don’t worry if you make mistakes. In fact, be worried if you don’t. Make more mistakes. Get out there. Learn from each and every one, absorb the lessons into your bloodstream. It’s often only from a life hard-lived that wisdom is born.
  7. If at all possible, avoid drinking malt liquor.
  8. You need to have thick skin. No matter what you do, you’re going to have critics. You’re going to be laughed at, made fun of, and torn down. Don’t pay them any mind. You’re already your worst critic, and rightfully so. None of us are perfect, but none of us deserve the ridicule so many face each and every day. Let every insult be a fire, and use those fires to forge iron nerves.
  9. Find something — or someone — you love, something that makes your palms sweat and your heart beat a little faster. Let it destroy you, tear you limb from limb and piece you back together into a better human being. Life is too short to live without passion.
  10. If you’ve never smoked a cigarette in your life, don’t start now. Some people say quitting is the hardest thing they’ve ever had to do. Don’t try and test that theory.
One clap, two clap, three clap, forty?

By clapping more or less, you can signal to us which stories really stand out.