End of the road
A sadness so profound,
Washed over me in waves,
Some things are never what they seem,
Some bonds too broken to repair,
The ills have garnered,
For far too long,
Alas now it is too late,
They remain dark and cloudy,
Swept under the listless carpet,
Remnants of a dreary past..My momentary hopes,
Of unison and peace,
Which lit up my quiet, fierce nights,
Now lie crushed and forgotten,
Under my damp and wornout pillows,
Alongside yesterday's blooming jasmine,
It's fragrance now, more a myth than reality..But perhaps all is not lost, Life may…
My name is Joy
My name is Joy,
Though I am rather joyless,
My matriarch named me so,
Though I can never fathom why!I had big dreams,
And a cheery demeanor,
But now I am bitter,
Old, cold and morose,
The scion of a bigot
And surrounded by nosy aunts and creepy uncles,
I no longer know who I am,
Or how to use my voice,
I have lost my voice a long, long time ago,
My silver tongue has lost its sheen,
And my back has a mean curve!I am rich, crazy rich! But I am stingy…
Paint me Lilac
The soft rustle of heirloom silk,
Gently shorn off my wanting back,
And then, there gently arose,
Wispy hairs that burned and swayed,
Unaware of follies,
And fearless in their stance,
In full throes they embraced,
My wilful homecoming..As he washed me over,
In lilac, lush and youthful,
I arched and crooned,
A proud peacock in full bloom,
I am neither him nor her,
I am true but unsure,
I am yours to hold on to,
And yours to cherish,
I maybe hard to placate,
But nudge me, oh just a little bit!Burnt sienna and…
Imprisoned
Why am I caught
In an abyss of gloom?
Why do I feel caged
A prisoner of my mind?
Why am I living
A reality that is a lie?
Why am I chugging along
Pretending all is well?Hey listen will you my girl!
There ain't no rewards,
For concealing your self
There ain't no applause,
For that false smile!Why then do I crave,
For that illusion of success,
For fame and for perfection,
For power and for brilliance?Why am I not content To just smell the roses, To just breathe in the scent, To pause for…
Oh Darn Boy
Oh darn boy,
You can’t look to fall in love,
You have to fall in love!I won't let you court me anymore,
I won't run my fingers down your ebony back,
I won't look deep into your sunset eyes,
Or whisper sweet nothings into star studded skies,I will gruffly brush you aside,
And pretend not to be touched,
I will pretend my heart is not shattered,
And walk away before I change my mind,No, I am not your Olive's mother, I am not her, yes, it's true The quivering heart has no reprieve, And…
Lau
This year I am poor,
But in heart I am rich!
All for a friendship fondly caroused,
High on life and laughter!Until you glided past,
I prided on facades
Until you, I didn’t have no bestie
Until you, there never was
But Mo, what do you want?’
Until then, nobody’d ever said,
‘Wherever you are, I am gonna come for you!’My itsy bitsy life ain’t bleak no more,
You are the reason that I now know,
That I matter and my tiny voice too,
However slight and fleeting!Our lows may have hit rock bottom, And our…
Writhe
The voices in my head,
They gnaw me apart,
My eyebrows furrowed,
And my forehead linedMy cheeks have sunken,
Oh, they no longer glow,
My lips so parched,
Their yearning uncontainedOh my sweet bubble,
Has tumbled and crashed,
It writhes and moans,
Smothered in self-pity
It wallows and hollers,
Smeared in self-loathing!For it knows not,
How best to reprieve,
How best to grieve,
How to burst forth,
In laughter and abandon!There ain't never happiness, Without deep sorrow, There ain't never wisdom, Without searing pain, There ain't never closure, Without soothing kindness, There ain't never reason…
MY PUMPKIN GIRL
You may be crestfallen,
At that newly minted bulge,
At the scales that might tip,
At those pants a tad tighter!Your cheeks may be fuller,
And you may waddle as you prance,
Still always my pumpkin girl,
I will pen sonnets about you!There may be one too many,
Prying eyes and hushed whispers,
You may lose your golden sheen,
And you may deprive yourself,
Of that itsy bitsy sweetness,
Or that extra piece of pie!Don’t ever my pumpkin girl! …
WARRIOR HEART
You may be in pieces,
In shreds, likely ripped apart,
Still you always gotta know,
How to choose your poison!While Countess Luann may croon,
Oh! But ‘Money can’t buy you class’,
You nod along yet toe the line,
For things, paltry and transient!The applause for conformity,
Alluring, and slyly beckoning!
But why oh why, are you seduced?
A life half lived ain’t a life lived!Oh tamed heart ask yourself,
Deep down, what arouses you?
Depth, intensity, emotion or charge?
Warrior hearts should never astray!And yes, you will doubtless age! Aimless, and as old as…
Ode
This ode was written as part of a not-so-recent flooding of nostalgia. Friends who knew me intimately read it and tried to guess the identity of the ‘old lover’. ‘Is it him?’.. ‘Oh wait, is it the other one?’ In truth, it is never one or the other. It is an amalgamation of past loves. Or as a cheeky dear friend would often confide, ‘I have an imaginary boyfriend, he is nicer than my real one’. ;)
My family from the sub continent who is reading this is probably totally judging me. Because aren’t you supposed to be chaste…
Mrudhula Koshy
Writer. Urban Designer moonlighting as occasional poet and storyteller.
