Please, somebody tell Jon what a piece of shit this guy is…

We all know “Winter is Here”… blah blah blah. I’d normally let half the season play out before I start watching but I’d literally stab one of you if you spoiled anything so I’m actually hype for tonight. My predictions for the season so I can be a complete dick if I’m right.

1. Gendry Returns

2. Gendry and Arya reunite and their relationship mirrors that of Rhaeghar and Lyana. Could be in the final season but soon, either way.

3. Sam learns the secret to forging Valyrian steel at the Citadel and shares the secret with Gendry who can actually forge it, dragonfire is almost definitely a key component, dragonfire and/or the blood of a Targaryen.

4. Euron Steals Drogon, one of the most badass things about Euron is the horn dragon binder that he possesses. Drogon is aggressive as fuck and basically already naturally rocks evil colors. Also Dany has no real control over that motherfucker anyway, and George will definitely make us regret liking the dragons so much. So definitely in the books, who knows with the show. Dragon binder and his dark magic ties (he fucking kidnaps the warlocks that survived Dany’s escape and drinks their hallucinogenic telepath juice) haven’t even been hinted at on the show.

5. Bran will be revealed to be Bran The Builder. Bran can time travel, it is known. This will become a thing for him and there just so happens to be a Bran from history who helps build the Wall, Storm’s end and Winterfell, oh yea and he founded House Stark, probably also came up with their house words. At least one of these instances specifically mentions a young boy being the bran in these tales. Some people think he’s literally every Bran that ever existed in this story, but I don’t see why the fuck he’d be his own uncle that he knows chokes to death trying to save his father from being burned alive…

6. Speaking of burning alive, it will probably be revealed Bran played a part in the mad king’s decent into madness. In the same season that we see Bran ruined Hodor’s mind by warging into him to affect the present, we also see visions of the mad king yelling burn them all in a very hold the door type of fashion. Bran didn’t really complete his training and basically has no idea what he’s doing, maybe on his way to becoming Bran the builder he also plays a part in several tragedies in our story’s history.

7. We finally see Rhaegar. Rhaegar is basically a mythical figure in our story. Think Jon Snow but not a bastard, a prince, in his 20s, happier, playing a fucking harp. Some think he kidnapped and raped Lyana Stark, some think they were in love and ran off to have a secret wedding. Those of us who know, think he was probably trying to fufill a prophecy and she was underage, so yea they better drive home how creepy that relationship had to be.

8. Quaithe, I’m not sure if the show writers even remember she exists. Quaithe has been subtly guiding Dany the entire time in the books despite only being in one scene in the show. Some believe she is helping Dany remember her true nature, “Remember who you are, Daenerys, … The dragons know. Do you?”, others think she’s pushing Dany further into madness, remember Dany’s bloodriders, of course not, the show killed them all off immediately and they had no purpose, but in the books Rakharo wisely says this, “Khaleesi, …better a man should swallow scorpions than trust in the spawn of shadows, who dare not show their face beneath the sun. It is known”.

9. Tyrion is revealed to be a Targaryen. This is just a fact same as R + L = J was for so long.

10. Cleganebowl. Undead Mountain VS The Holy Hound. Sandor Clegane aka The Hound who has an insane feud with his insane, monstrous brother has just joined a group who: A. was created by Ned Stark to bring The Mountain and his men to justice. And B: In the show is lead by Beric Dondarrion (who is ironically undead himself) to hunt the upcoming undead threat from the North.

11. Dany is the next Mad Queen after Cersei. My disdain for Dany as a character is well documented. Obsession with fire and blood, poor planning, lack of knowledge of the people she “liberates” complete lack of strategy or ideals.

12. Last but definitely not least, it’s gettin to be about the time that it is revealed Littlefinger is the Archvillian of this whole thing. Littlefinger started ALL OF THIS. Remember the major death at the beginning of our story? The Hand of The King, Jon Arryn, the man who was like a father to Ned, the man Ned named Jon after when he had to come up with a fake, non Targaryen name. Remember how we find out that Littlefinger seduced his wife, got her to poison him, got her to write a letter saying it was the Lannisters which lead to Catelyn taking Tyrion, which lead to Jamie slaughtering Ned’s men and eventually capturing Ned, which lead to all out war? Yea, that wasn’t even the beginning of Littlefinger’s dirt.

I’ll do an entire seperate post of this but we learn about Lord Baelish early on, we learn, “You know what I learnt losing that duel? I learnt that I’ll never win. Not that way. That’s their game, their rules. I’m not going to fight them, I’m going to f**k them. That’s what I know, that’s what I am, and only by admitting what we are can we get what we want.” The duel he’s referring to is the one he had against Brandon Stark, Ned’s older brother, fighting to win the hand of Catelyn Tully, the eventual mother of Ned Stark’s children. Not too long after this, when Lyana Stark runs off with Rhaeghar, SOMEONE starts the rumor that Rhaeghar kidnapped and raped Lyana. This would lead Ned Stark’s father and brother to King’s Landing to confront Rhaeghar only to find he was not there, and the Mad King and his sick “justice” was all that awaited them. Ned’s father was burned alive by wildfire, while Brandon’s hands and neck were bound together with his blade just out of reach. Brandon died, choking himself to death trying to save his father… this also began Robert’s Rebellion.