Frozen by Fear
My granddaughter is terrified of Portia.
Since they moved in, Portia spends most of her time upstairs. I’m the only person that she really likes and since I work all day she stays out of sight until I come home. When she emerges, my granddaughter keeps a close eye on her. What she (my granddaughter) does not understand, because she’s a four-year-old, is that cats are natural predators and since she keeps watching Portia, Portia may or may not feel threatened and may or may not react to that perceived threat in a negative way.
Keeping them both calm is a balancing act. Walking by Portia in order to get to the kitchen used to be inconceivable for my granddaughter. Yesterday she walked by her and came to me and said, “I’m brave Gam Gam.”
She calls me Gam Gam.
In that moment I wanted to cry because she has come a long way. The fear is still there but she has not allowed it to stop her.
Initially, I had to force myself not to tell my granddaughter “don’t be scared” because I never wanted her to get the idea that fear is wrong or bad. Fear can be used as a tool that can protect us. Her fear stopped her from being too aggressive with Portia and getting scratched, however, over time, even though she felt fear, she made the long walk to the kitchen and everything worked out.
