Hi Irwansyah,

I apologise if my comment on this thread is unwelcome in any way. As a psychologist I thought I might try to share some thoughts.

Years of research repeatedly shows that, as individuals, we would like to believe that the world is just and moral and that good things happen to good people. Similarly, we are biased to believe that people whom bad things have happened to, surely deserve them.

If the world worked that way, we could easily control what happens to us and we could feel safe: just be a good person and nothing bad will ever happen to you. There are plenty of published studies showing that people hold this “just world hypothesis” and that it has a role to play in why we may be naturally want to assume that the victim is at fault. If one can’t find what the victim did wrong and not prove that they deserve what happened to them, it may mean that anything can happen to anyone…which is a thought people are scared of.

In reality — from anyone’s personal experience — it should be clear that the world is not, in fact, a fair place. You can’t always control whether bad things happen to you. Plenty of horrible things happen to wonderful people.

It is also worth bearing in mind, that hindsight is another factor which will skew your opinion. There have been plenty of situations where I would have made the same choice as a friend before an incident…and yet I believed that I never would have made this choice after I knew the outcome.

It is worth strongly evaluating your own biases before risking to make comments that may strongly upset a person who has made herself vulnerable and mentioned in the article that she has been feeling guilty and ashamed…about a situation that is to blame on an irresponsible, delusional, entitled man who may have grown up in a culture where we place too much responsibility on victims and too little on the perpetrators. He is not allowed to think (and nobody should help him think) that a woman — or anyone — who has responded to a reasonable airbnb advertisement is then also to blame for his disgusting advances.