Letter from a 5 Year Old to Donald Trump
In my spare time, I mentor a group of kindergarteners at a local school. I asked them to write a letter to Donald Trump ahead of the inauguration.
Here’s one that struck me.
Dear Pesident Tump,
How are you? I am five years old. In a few months I will be six. Then later I will be seven. After that, eight. I know my numbers, Mr. Tump.
Mommy says her favoritest thing in the world is when I count; I use to count the number of beers daddy had every night, before he married his secatary. She looks like the Fist Lady!
Mr. Tump, are you excited to be Pesident? I am. I know one day I’m gonna be the bestest Pesident in the whole wide world, except for Iraq. I don’t wanna be Pesident there.
Mr. Tump, why do people say your bad? I think your good. The Pesident is good because hes the Pesident. We all should listen to and obey everything he says. The Constipation is also good, including the 2nd Comamdment, because its from a million years ago, when things were good. The older something is, the more we should cling to it. Take it from me, a five year old.
Mr. Tump, I have an couple of questions please.
- How come you have so many Mrs. Tumps?
- What kind of doggie will you get at the White House?
- Why do they call it the White House?
- What is your plan to reduce our reliance on fossil fuels generally, and OPEC specifically?
- I made a doody, Mr. Tump.
Ok, teacher says I have to go now. Thank you Mr. Tump.
Sincerely, Billy, age of 5
PS. Mr. Tump, you look like my favoritest person on Sesame Street, Ernie!
