Little Deeds Can Strengthen The Bonds
What would you prefer being interesting or be interested? This was the question I have encountered during one of my project work and for an instance it made me think about what really matters? At first I thought both are essentials but as I was writing a comment I came to realize that being interested is way more important and why is that well let’s just dive into that topic. But before diving into the matter I have a question for you and the question is: would you like someone to take an interest in you or being interested in you, to acknowledge and notice you?
I guess everyone does like the idea of someone being interested in them as some people wants others to acknowledge them or some might want others to appreciate them, right! But the real question is why we have to be interested in others? First of all if you want people to take an interest in you, you have to show the same interest in them as you want to see from their side, it’s like a two way process in order to get something fruitful you have to give them something.
The most important thing of being interested in others is to get a chance to easily interact with them and show your care and passion about them which will eventually make them feel nice as well as it will create a good impression and promote your passion that you really want to know them better to create a good harmony. And when you talk to them not about yourself but their selves you get a sense of selfless and how it feels when you care about the people around you, it makes you empathize with them.
People love when someone is there to listen to them so they can speak their heart out. Listening is also one way to be interested in others as people really like to speak more than usual when there is someone who wants to listen to them about their life happening such as their joys & sorrows, can easily share the secrets & lighten up their burden. It sort of developed a bond between each other as the author Dale Carnegie wrote in his book “How to win Friends and Influence People” :
“You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you”
So the answer to the question you have read at the start is if you really want someone to be interested in you, you have to be interested in others first. You have to show your passion, care and commitment. When you get interested in someone and try to persuade him it automatically starts a two sided reaction and the other person shows interest in you too. Dale Carnegie wrote in his book about a magician named Thurston that how he showed a completely different and genuine interest in people as compared to other magicians. Dale wrote:
“He told me that many magicians would look at the audience and say to themselves, “Well, there is a bunch of suckers out there, a bunch of hicks; I’ll fool them all right.” But Thurston’s method was totally different. He told me that every time he went on stage he said to himself: “I am grateful because these people come to see me, They make it possible for me to make my living in a very agreeable way. I’m going to give them the very best I possibly can.”
I myself tried to be interested in others and asked my friend regular questions like how is he? What’s he doing these days? And what he will be doing on weekends or what he really wants to do? I was amazed to know that he actually wants to be a motivational speaker and not just a speaker who took training and classes and start his career as a motivational speaker. First he wants to do something motivational in his life so then he can motivate others with his real life story and it really makes me feel happy for him that he cares about motivating others through his actions and I learned something new and interesting about him by simply showing some interest in his life and I realized the answer to the very first question that being interested is far way more important than being interesting.
I’ll now end this blog by stating the Dale’s principle about being interested in people which he wrote in his book at the end of the chapter “Do This And You’ll Be Welcome Anywhere”
” If you want others to like you, if you want to develop real friendships, if you want to help others at the same time as you help yourself, keep this principle in mind:
Principle 1 Become genuinely interested in other people”
