The Best Accessory You Can Have

In the movie Burnt, Chef Adam Jones (Bradley Cooper) can be seen berating a young chef for lacking what he considers a key personality ingredient for all chefs; Confidence. Great chefs do seem to posses a certain air of culinary wizardry. I mean, how else can they put thee olives, a smear of seaweed and a spritz of olive oil on a clam shaped plate and call it a meal, AND, make us pay for it, all while keeping a straight face. Confidence I tell you. Absolutely alluring, magnetizing, bordering on arrogance, CONFIDENCE! And honestly, it looks damn good.

A great amount of self-confidence, is also what gave us this political nugget from the US President, Barack Obama … “I actually think I’m a pretty good president. I believe if I ran again, I could win.”

Your level of self-confidence can show in many ways: your behavior, your body language, how you speak, what you say, and so on. Confident people generally like themselves, think positively about the future and are willing to take risks to achieve their personal and professional goals. The great news is that confidence is something that you can build on your own, so keep reading to find out how you too can have the best accessory out there.

Empower yourself by investing in knowledge — Benjamin Franklin said it best, “An investment in knowledge pays the best interest.Empowering yourself, in general, is one of the best strategies for building self-confidence. Knowledge is limitless and infinite. Education empowers you. By becoming more knowledgeable, you’ll be more self-confident. So start reading, start researching, start studying, start talking to the people around you.

Photoshop your self-image — Our self-image means so much to us, more than we often realize. We have a mental picture of ourselves, and it determines how confident we are in ourselves. But this picture isn’t fixed and immutable. You have the power to change it. Oh Photoshop, I detest your product when I see the results plastered across magazine covers that tell me what I should look like, but permission to use it on my self-image, you know, something good for a change that, actual increases rather than decreases one’s self-image

Vanquish negative thoughts — You have to learn to be aware of your self-talk, the thoughts you have about yourself and what you’re doing. Negative thoughts and emotions also make us mentally weak, and a weak psyche results in low self-esteem and lack of confidence. Learn to start each day with a happy and positive thought. Happiness plays a very important part in your confidence levels and if you are truly happy, half your work is already done.

Get to know yourself — Sun Tzu said,Know yourself and you will win all battles.” You can’t defeat the enemy without knowing him and sometimes we are our own worst enemy. Get to know yourself well. Start listening to your thoughts. Start writing a journal about yourself, and about the thoughts you have about yourself, and analyzing why you have such negative thoughts. And then think about the good things about yourself, the things you do well, the things you like. Start thinking about your limitations, and whether they’re real limitations or just ones you’ve allowed to be placed there.

Exercise — Exercising will make you feel better about yourself, give you more energy and encourage better life choices and a better attitude. Exercising helps your body to produce endorphins. Endorphins are chemicals in the brain that make you feel good. A large portion of our self-confidence comes from how we feel in our own skin, how we think we look and how healthy our body feels inside. Confidence is a mind and body state.

Lack of activity destroys the good condition of every human being, while movement and methodical physical exercise save it and preserve it.” ~Plato~

Think of problems as challenges rather than as life-ending events — Confident people recognize that challenges are blessings in disguise, no matter how poorly timed they appear to be. They serve an important purpose that will ultimately enhance our lives, not to worsen them. Another great way to look at it is that problems take the mind into the past and the future, causing stress, anxiety, fear, anger, depression, and resentment whereas challenges, on the other hand, take place in the now. You know they are in your mind only temporarily. Challenges only live in the moment and denote a current life lesson — a teacher from which to learn. The lesson ends, and you move on to bigger and better.

Dress the part — How we dress affects us in a multitude of ways from how we feel to how we are addressed. When you start paying attention to how you are dressed, your self-confidence starts to grow. This does not mean go off and spend a few thousands on a new wardrobe. Absolutely not! It means buying a few, quality, key mix and match pieces that make you feel and look your best. Your closet represents a selection of pathways to the best versions of yourself. So ask yourself each time you buy and put something on, Which version of yourself are you representing today?

“Somehow I can’t believe that there are any heights that can’t be scaled by a man who knows the secrets of making dreams come true. This special secret, it seems to me, can be summarized in four C’s. They are curiosity, confidence, courage, and constancy, and the greatest of all is confidence. When you believe in a thing, believe in it all the way, implicitly and unquestionable.” ~Walt Disney ~

Self-confidence is extremely important in almost every aspect of our lives, and people who lack it can find it difficult to become successful. Building it will of course take time. The pursuit of which, may be something that never really ends. So you might as well get started now.

What are some of your go to, tried and true confidence boosters?

Originally published at on January 14, 2016.