My Avoidant Ex – Medium

My Avoidant Ex

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How My First Boyfriend, a Murder Suspect, Shaped My Anxious Attachment

At 17, my first boyfriend was the main suspect in a satanic ritual killing, creating severe anxious attachment that’s taken 22 years to…

Dec 7, 2024

How My First Boyfriend, a Murder Suspect, Shaped My Anxious Attachment

Dec 7, 2024

What Makes Avoidants Fall Crazy in Love (or Fall Back in Love)

Avoidants’ mesolimbic dopamine system is more reliably activated by mutual purpose than by emotional theatrics

1d ago

What Makes Avoidants Fall Crazy in Love (or Fall Back in Love)

1d ago

Wait, is this Connection or Co-dependency?

When two people merge into one tangled person…

2d ago

Wait, is this Connection or Co-dependency?

2d ago

Anxious-Avoidant Chemistry: Why It Feels Like Fate

Attraction is sometimes the recognition of a wound — your wound — reflected back at you through someone else’s nervous system

2d ago

Anxious-Avoidant Chemistry: Why It Feels Like Fate

2d ago

How the Anxious Preoccupied Can Have the Best Relationship with an Avoidant

You only stand a chance if you do this…

2d ago

How the Anxious Preoccupied Can Have the Best Relationship with an Avoidant

2d ago

Don’t Fix Me, Just Hold Me: The Emotional Repair Language of Each Attachment Style

Because our nervous systems are trained by what used to work, we reach for what’s familiar — not what’s effective

3d ago

Don’t Fix Me, Just Hold Me: The Emotional Repair Language of Each Attachment Style

3d ago

The Avoidant’s Disappearing Act - What’s Going On Internally During Withdrawal?

How the avoidant brain switches from ventral vagal state into dorsal vagal shutdown — the neurobiological overload explanation

4d ago

The Avoidant’s Disappearing Act - What’s Going On Internally During Withdrawal?

4d ago

Oxytocin Confusion: Why Intimacy Feels So Good… and Then So Threatening

There’s a moment, sometimes quiet and beautiful, where your hand touches theirs and something inside you exhales. It’s closeness. Real…

5d ago

Oxytocin Confusion: Why Intimacy Feels So Good… and Then So Threatening

5d ago

The Fine Line Between Anxious Attachment and Borderline Personality Disorder

People with Borderline Personality Disorder often assume they simply have an anxious attachment style. And it’s understandable — on the…

6d ago

The Fine Line Between Anxious Attachment and Borderline Personality Disorder

6d ago

The White Matter Highway Between Emotion and Logic: How the Uncinate Fasciculus Shapes Your…

There’s a strip of brain wiring you’ve probably never heard about. It doesn’t show up in self-help books or Instagram therapy posts. But…

Jul 3

The White Matter Highway Between Emotion and Logic: How the Uncinate Fasciculus Shapes Your…

Jul 3

My Avoidant Ex

My Avoidant Ex

she/her

I'm Molly: therapist & prev anxious after my first boyfriend was a murder suspect. I studied attachment theory & write about it. www.instagram.com/myavoidantex

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