For The Aging Covert Narcissist, Karma Is A Bitch
What does justice look like for a covert narc? It’s not pretty. Age — and the approaching end — throw us all off our game.
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Your covert narcissist put you through hell.
Only you and I know how bad it was.
It was bad. So bad. Really bad,
It was bad.
They tried to destroy you. At some point, you realized they didn’t care if you lived or died.
Well, maybe they had a sight preference for your death.
With these over-the-top relationship dynamics, who could blame you if you wanted revenge?
Revenge versus cosmic justice
Revenge is possible — but it’s tricky and difficult. The very nature of their disorder makes everything coverts do justifiable to them. It helps them rationalize away normal human emotion that would ordinarily cause your straightforward acts of evoking jealousy or giving them the silent treatment (the very things they do to you) to work. Instead, they’re completely ineffective.
You can’t hurt them in any emotional sense that you and I would recognize — that’s for sure. They have no emotional depth to respond to your carefully-aimed strikes— the equivalent of emotional nuclear bombs. The soul-crushing revenge bomb you released on them isn’t something you could ever survive, if it was unleashed on you — yet you watch them do nothing more than smirk and stare blankly into space. You would be wrecked, sobbing in your room for months. You were so certain you could crush them.
You can’t. Not like that.
LET THE UNIVERSE GET COSMIC JUSTICE
Better to let the universe take care of it.
EVERYONE ages. EVERYONE dies.
There’s just no way they can keep their delusional play premiering forever.
Narcissism at its very core is about control, which is about fear, which is about fear of death. Fear of non-being. I mean, you’re definitely not in control of anything if you don’t exist at all.
Most of us have a hard time wrapping our heads around these huge existential concepts. Narcissists can’t go anywhere near them.
They live in their fantasy of immortality right up until the last moment.
DANCING AROUND THE FIRE
As long as someone is paying attention to you, it’s a pretty good bet you’re not dead.
It’s the equivalent of gathering together and dancing around the fire to ward off evil spirits.
It’s staying in the game. If you only think about winning the game, you can convince yourself there’s no way to lose.
It’s about getting something, good or bad, from someone. Anyone. It’s about affecting another sentient being and the power you feel in that moment.
We all fear death in some way but a narcissist hides this fear from themselves like they hide all fear, doubt, and terror — behind a pleasing smile and pleasant words that they use to deceive you.
THE AGING NARCISSIST
As they age, supply becomes harder to get. They are fighting an uphill battle. And they know it. Their desperation shows, which makes them even less likely to find a source of supply.
THE GREAT COSMIC BAIT AND SWITCH
“Come, traveler. Dance with me around the fire and together we will keep the night creatures at bay. We will build a wall of light, and behind it, we will be glowing human spirits made safe from the dangers of the dark primal forest”, says the narcissist.
You look at the fire. You’re tired and you’re cold, you have traveled a long way. The covert is smiling and their hand is reaching for you and no alarm bells sound.
You decide to join them.
Only to find they were lying all along.
Their plan was never to unite WITH you to resist the dangers of this cruel and dangerous world.
Their plan was to sacrifice you to the twisted creature that lives inside them, a creature they locked away a long time ago — in a windowless room of their psyche, shackled and subdued but still alive. Their true self.
You will be sacrificed to the monster that lives inside their head, in exchange for safe passage through the dark primal forests and one more night to dance around the fire.
The joke is on them.
No matter how many sacrifices are made to appease the Grim Reaper, death comes as the end.
What more revenge do you need than that?
YOU HAVE ALL THE POWER.
YOU’VE ALWAYS HAD IT.
RISE UP
AND TAKE IT.
Good luck out there — myla
Before you go could you do two favors? ( I know. I ask a lot)
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DOMESTIC VIOLENCE: If you’re with a narcissist, leave if you can. Go no contact if you can. If you’ve been a victim of physical or emotional abuse, call 800–799–7233
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YOU SHOULD SEE ME IN A CROWN — Billy Ellish
Listen to music that empowers you. Listen to this
