The art of Listening
Lately, I’m trying to be patience; Instead what I got is this simple lesson called “The Art of Listening”. The art of listening sounds so simple but yet, it is one of the hardest act to do for most people. Personally, I think it is not all about age factor, it’s more about our “intention”. Do we intent to listen and understand or less listening and more of replying? Totally, I agree with the quote above.
I know we are not perfect listener or/and sometime we aren’t focus, but whatever the reason(s) for us for not listening, we have to make sure the other person aware. Unconsiciously, the art of not listening, have turned into habit that we might not be aware off. At first, we ask ourself, what make them lose an interest in the conversation; Maybe we talk too slow or too loud or perhaps too fast. We seek the faults in us first. But if they repeat it over and over again, the fault is not within us. It is shall be called their “habit”.
It’s the same goes for us too; if we are not willing to listen but so eager to reply, then we must slowly change our bad habit. And you know there are lot people who only listen only at some part of the story and yet ended up throwing arguments for the wrong things. I’m sure these common situations happened a lot even including to your family members.
Listening to someone can often make us bored to death, especially if its the same old topic; but perhaps, what that person needed is someone to listen. Have you been in the wrong situations that make you speechless and the only thing you want to do is to be listened? That’s the art! That if only we can take certain moments to listen, to just shut up, to hold our emotions, and hold our actions, things may have changed more positively. Communication requires two ways; not one — listen and reply ; not to listen all the time or to keep replying every time; nor listen to just a bit, then keep replying. Both have to be balanced.
So what should we do if we aren’t being listened? Take deep breath , repeat again the topic and if that person answers are out of topic, then ask them kindly “do you listen what I say? or do you “understand what I say?” . I know it’s hard, it’s annoying but we have to change and so does the ones whom we talk too! You have to make sure that they listen, understand and reply the same topic. But above all, we have to change the way we communicate. You can not generalised the way you communicate to one person is the same as to others; you have to adapt; you have to filter our words, restructure your sentences, your tones and attitudes.
Perhaps, the fault may also come from us. And if we keep communicating in the same way with everyone, it may leads to more miscommunication, more anger (tired) and miscommunication breaks everything. So, let’s start doing the art of listening by ourself, understand about the people whom we communicate, find ways to build an effective communication towards them, and listen first than reply.