Are you accountable for your Flesh n Blood?
Let’s take a moment to think about what we expect from our kids. We want them to be honest. We want them to do anything they promise to do. We want them to take care of their assigned responsibilities. We want them to be present and to be there when we need them. We expect them to be accountable.
However, do we hold ourselves to the same standards? Are we as parents good role models of the values we want our children to have?
And how about the fathers?
We really do need to address our culture of not holding a father accountable for their child. It’s often left on the mothers to take care of fulfilling the promises and responsibilities that should fall on the father.
This does not erase any hurt and disappointment the child feels when a father does not hold themselves accountable for their own promises and responsibilities.
Keep in mind, I’m not talking child support or keeping a roof over their head. These are important responsibilities, but I want to focus on what you teach a child about men. What your example tells your sons on how to act when they grow up. What you teach your daughters to expect from a relationship with a man when she grows up.
I’m talking keeping promises. Being present. Spending time with them. Making them feel loved. Making sure they are valued and cared for. What do they see through you? Do they see a man as someone that is present? A good provider? Someone who will be there? Someone who keeps their word? Someone who builds up and encourages, or tears down and disappoints? What values and expectations is your presence and the words you breathe teaching them?
More than money, children need your example. They need your time. Your affirmations. Your fulfilled promises, or sincere apologies if you can’t come through. These things don’t cost any money, but they affect their beliefs and behaviors for a lifetime.
So let’s get this Kaptivating Konversation rolling! I want to hear from the men in particular.
Why do think some men need someone else to keep them accountable for their own flesh and blood? What to you personally need to hold yourself accountable as a father to your children? How do you hold yourself accountable to your kids, or what would you like to work on? Is there any advise you need but have been afraid to reach out for?