- I woke up this morning feeling thirsty so I rushed to grab some water from my fridge and as usual after drinking, I stood infront of my dressing mirror for a while to look at myself.For the very first time, I stood for minutes just admiring myself and smiling .I kept saying to myself…. “wow!I love the woman I’ve grown to become”. Remniscing those days people called me smallish and the times my friends will snob me and hit me with those three words “You are ugly” after every quarel with them. I sat in my couch, took my album and started flipping through.Indeed, every picture tells a story. I could remember vividly where I was and where I took all those pictures.It was as if every flip came with a change.A drastic change! I realised I had changed in every picture.either from being skinny to a little fleshy or being short to the opposite, from my hair colour and length, to my body contours but I realised one thing never changed and that is “My innerbeing”. Growing up,I had a major challenge dealing with my inferiority complex. I always saw myself as ugly . I would go no where near anybody who teases me in anyway. I remember how I used to run to my uncle who was then a teacher in my school every now and then to complain about how my mates treated me in class and how I wished I could leave the school for good. I lived with the notion that I’m ugly for years and it kept eating me up. I would never reply Thanks to anyone who told me I am beautiful. I felt it was a way of making fun of me or felt the person is faking. I was never that mirror loving young girl. I would run to hide whenever I see anything like a mirror or would quickly cover my face with my hands whenever I saw myself in anything reflective.This went on for years till I entered the high school. Most guys be hitting on me and writing letters to me just to tell me how beautiful I look and how they need me as a friend or a girlfriend.I quite remember going straight to one of them to warn him not to ever look at me or even think of writing such rubbish to me anymore.The issue blew up. Every guy tagged me as rude. I kept changing routes anytime I saw a group of guys anywhere on the school compound.I always thought they are gonna talk about me or say something that will hurt me so its better not to go anywhere close to especially guys. In my third year, I noticed most of the letters I got were from the nicest and well known guys in the school. So I thought, if these nice guys see me as nice, then it means I’m really that nice. Thenceforth, I started loving myself.I cultivated the habit of looking into the mirror for minutes and dressing up to look good for classes or for any social gathering in school but it wasn’t all gone. I still had the fear of sitting in the midst of so called “beautiful people”. During group discussions in class,I’ll sit quietly and say nothing till its over just because I didn’t want to be noticed and maybe, laughed at when I make a mistake. I grew up with a little inferiority complex hiding somewhere within . I enetered the corporate world with it,the church and everywhere.Funny enough, nobody saw anything wrong with it. Most people would conclude, Im just a shy girl and its normal but I knew deep within that there was more to it. I had nobody to talk to about.It was later that I noticed it was one of the main reasons I couldn’t make my past relationships work. I affiliated every issue to the fact that I think im not too good or too beautiful for them and thus, their reasons for not treating me well. Luckily I found a man who could relate to what I was going through and helped me get over it.Then my boyfriend,now my husband. He always gave me a reason to look at myself and smile.Tells me I’m the most beautiful woman in the world even when in tatters. I learnt to embrace my whole being and cherish my features. Im one hell of a confident woman now.I have no doubts I’m the most beautiful woman the world has ever had.I turn my flaws to perfection and learn everyday. I’ve come to love what people do not like about me.And the word “hate” has never being in existence since I came out of darkness. My light is never dim. I make sure I shine wherever I find myself and I create a vacuum that no one can occupy when I’m away. I always leave a mark on people’s lips. A mark of smile. I’m now a phenomenal woman, within me is the power to create,to nurture and transform.
Have you ever thought how beautiful or handsome you would have been if you loved yourself a little more than everybody loves you?. Imagine a world with nobody, just you. A world surrounded by nothing and no one to tell you how your dress fits perfectly on you or how your beard is neatly shaved. How are you going to deal with that? Are you not going to appreciate yourself afterall? Don’t wait to hear compliments from people before you start with yourself. Let others see and feel how you believe in yourself with or without them. Quit over-burdening yourself with negativity else, any little thing you hear others talk about you will shut you down totally.Also, if you are fond of making people feel bad about themselves and their looks,cut it! because you can kill a spirit and cause someone to even think of or commit suicide. Mingle with positive minded, courageous and determined people.They help alot when you are a little down with yourself. Do not be afraid to exhibit your flaws. It is through them that you can learn and be a better person.
Rock that fault on your body! if its big lips,spice it up and make it look like a model’s “full lips”. If its a flat or small booty, or big or small boobs, work it! wear clothes that won’t expose your less sides. Always be in vogue. I learnt to make my imperfections my selling point so how about YOU getting closer to your mirror ,look at yourself from head to toe and tell yourself “you are beautifully made, you are good, you will make it, no body can dim your shine, you are a winner, you are a conqueror, you are blessed and above all you are YOU”? So go ahead! it doesn’t cost a dime to have much love for yourself.