LIFE IS THE SOUL’S SAILING TOWARD ITSELF
FROM MY NARRATIVES: JOURNEY INTO MYSELF
You hesitate to believe because you have subjugated your mind to the norms of logic that divide; you have forgotten God’s unifying power.
“How could one compare the mass of the mountain with that of an ant; there is no scale to weight them one side against the other,” says your logic.The temple’s endurance doesn’t depend on the logic of the worshipers’ minds; rather, on the fervor of their hearts. You can only wonder about God’s mysteries.
“The secret of the ant is no less heavy than that of the mountain because what holds the equilibrium of the universe is not weight, rather the lightness of the spirit that penetrates the thick and thin,” I say.
Sand castles are good for amusement but not to befriend the winds; and storms have their laws that are not necessarily compatible with those of the sand.“When you become educated in the laws of the wind, wind you become.Then you can understand the secret behind the endurance of the royal palace; the kingdom’s towers and fortresses,” I remember Father’s words.
Things and peoples remain alien to one another so long there is no linkage between them. The letter addressed to the beloved is not ink and paper; rather a celebration of your love.Ties create values, and all dissolve when the linkage is broken. The mountain embraces the valley from its foundation; but the sweet songs of their union are heard on the peak.without songs its peak will vanish in a sea of loneliness.The mountain echoes the cries of the flute played in the depth of the valley. God is that flute creating the sweet melodies; the spirit that unites them in a divine intimacy.And without the power of foundation the mountain becomes dust in the wind. The mountain’s foundation stands on the depth of the valley and the peak connects the mountain and the valley to God.And when you descend from the mountain, embrace the valley in spite of the smell of its manures — just remember the flowers.
Behold,on the mountain I erect the temple to learn about the mountain’s language. But first I need to communicate with the Lord, who lives in the mountain, and in the abyss.Lost in the vastness of the desert, I have danced around its wells; the joy of life was expanding my soul. And you ask: “speak to me about yourself?”
“I am an ocean; God is alone capable to protect you while riding on my agitated waves to lead you to my peaceful shores. Ride my ship and find Him in the agitated waves, the clouded skies and the dark nights. We can’t touch the stars of heaven with our hands, but through our regards we communicate with them. We need not to understand, rather to contemplate. Sacred is the temple and the hearts that bow before its sanctity. I built you the ship. I seek not your compliment of how solid it is; rather your prayers that help the ship to safely reach the distant shores.And when I am settled inside my solid fortress, I fear not the enemy’s attacks; he is down below; I’m up. I dream to save you; saving oneself must the beginning of a long and tedious operation of saving others- otherwise, I’m a lone dove and the nest will bless not my cooing. I am the tree that grows in the ice. Through my generosity I dream to nourish the hungry. Through my solitude and suffering I dream to embrace and keep all into the deepest of my soul. And when the soul is rooted in God, heaven nourishes it, and the earth offers it as food to the hungry, water to the thirsty, and a song to the sad. I must become agreeable to all; it’s too shameful to grow in the bandage of selfishness.When you feel the urge of vomiting someone who doesn’t agree with you, just remember that difference is the one common link we have to reach God who resides over the entire universe. And from His spirit He nourishes all, little by little, like a mother- bird nourishing its babies.
You cry out loud: “I can’t digest you; you are too solid for my ulcerous stomach. And in silence I pray for the cure of your ulcer. Accept me through my kind gesture; God lurks behind man’s good intentions. Reject not the light, so that light may reject you not. Travelling in obscurity under God’s auspices is safer than travelling in the elusive man’s made- light. He is the light that illuminates; and man’s light is fire that burns and turns what it burns to ashes.
“When light blurs your eyes, slightly close them and let the light penetrate them gently; a strong light can be blinding as heavy obscurity. “The gentlest light comes from the One who has created it,” said Father’s wisdom.
You may fish in any water of your choice, but be reminded: the biggest fishes are found in God’s net. Like a stubborn fisherman, I dream to lure you into that net. God knocks and waits for you to open for Him. May we knock and wait. But once in, we must bless the house and its inhabitants. Having been seduced by the unknown and mysterious, behold, I wake up in the glacial dawn to sail to distant shores. And the solidity of my ship makes me not forget God who moves every breeze in the seas, follows every movement of the racing clouds, winds, storms, earthquakes, and all what escape our eyes and frighten our hearts. Despair not; God always will be waiting to guide you and me.Whoever fears to sail into himself, will be blown by the glacial winds that emerge from the seas of deception. The agitated seas will not spoil his dreams, and the foggy horizon will enchant his heart. Life is the soul’s long sailing toward itself.