Imagine that you possess something that has endless ways and chances to improve itself.
To become better and better.
Like if your mobile phone would upgrade itself from time to time without any developers in the background who are writing codes or designers who are working on making it look better. It’s just that thing itself. It’s not connected to the internet or any network however, still able to get any information it needs to evolve.
What if I tell you that you possess it already?
Also, it’s the very first thing when it comes to leading other people.
Okay, here comes a weird story:
Few days ago I was giving a head massage to my girlfriend. Been scratching her head for like 5 minutes when I just realized that almost everything I love about her is between my two hands. Apart from the rest of her body there she was. A not even 1,5kg organ that is responsible for all her actions, feelings and thoughts. If she makes a joke which I laugh at, it comes from her head. If she makes me the morning tea and brings it into the bedroom while I’m still sleeping, that kindness and caring…all that comes from there.
If you think about it it’s actually fricken amazing!
Your brain has command over almost everything that you do. When you are reading this very line, your brain understands the words after each other and give them the right meaning. It also thinks about the context. It senses the colors of this page. At the same time in the background it takes care about a few other not so important things like controlling body heat, recognizing incoming signals from the world around you also from your body and basically just keeping you alive. Of course none of them above are as important as reading this post… And that was irony as you might got it. Which means that your brain can even think in abstracts.
So to sum it up your brain is quite an awesome thing.
A thing. Something that you possess and can upgrade itself.
What a coincidence!
Even better. You don’t have to buy it, you most probably already have it. And here comes the fun part: You have control over it. You are that thing.
(Of course I mean control over almost every one of your actions or thoughts. Because sometimes you just can not restrain and moderate the reactions for the impulses, commands from outside. Like when I tell you not to think about a Big Pink Elephant. Good luck with that one.)
However in most of the cases you are the one who are in charge. If you want to lift up your left/right arm you can just do it. You don’t even think about how you do it. You just simply do it. You want it, then your brain sends out the signal to your muscles through your nerves in such a speed which even the German highway couldn’t handle. Then the tendon which is attached to your muscle on the one end will pull your bone on the other end. So finally your arm lifts. But normally you don’t think it through.
It’s a bit like the same with our thoughts. We think, we create reactions and answers to the outer world but rarely we think about how do we make them. Usually we don’t think about the process. And most rarely we question it.
If you look into the mirror and you see that you are not in the best shape for the beach, you can go and do something about it (if you want). You can do diet, workout or both. You can decide. And when you do it you read about it, you look up the topic and imagine it when you are eating healthy fruits how your body benefits from it. When you hit the gym you think about how your muscles are building up. You care about the process to get the desired result.
Good news everybody! We can do that to our mind as well. We can change it if we see that something is not right. Of course not the basic settings, just like with your body you can not change your hair colour by just will. However there are some things that can be changed or improved with some work.
Improving yourself however is not as easy as it sounds. It’s often much much harder than physical workout. Also you have to constantly remind yourself about it. For example your emotional intelligence is not high enough and it affects your relationships badly. You CAN change that, however it’s not an easy thing to do. Most importantly it needs time and constant effort. During every time you talk to somebody you have to remind yourself to try to understand him/her better and to give a quality feedback.
You can develop yourself. You can become better and better in things. Actually your brain’s structure will change too just like when you learn a new language. However to achieve it you’ll need focus, willpower and a strong commitment. You have to remember that you are the captain of your ship. The master of your sea.
So, how does it come to leadership and people management?
I would answer it with another questions; How could you lead or motivate others when you can not lead or motivate yourself? How could you help them find answers to their questions when you were never searching for your owns? How could you help them to develop themselves when you are not developing yourself?
You see, the very first step of leading others starts with learning to lead yourself. Even then you will face many many challenges when you are full control over your behaviour and actions. But then you will have the self discipline and self confidence to fight them and overcome!
Don’t be the one that holds with the hare and runs with the hounds. Be creditable. Show a good example to others. Improve yourself! You are the one who is in charge of those changes!
In the next post I will write about some very actionable steps that you can start with and try out immediately, in order to reach your next upgrade;
Are you interested in leadership? Thinking about how to motivate your people? Having trouble keeping the younger employees at your company? Let’s talk about it! Visit my page at https://about.me/zsoltattila and feel free to send me a message! For more posts, please follow me here!