Pregnancy.

It happened to me! Reaction? Happy and scared.

…and …

… It happened …

A few days before I finally decided to do the test, I actually was not worrying at all, having slow thyroid I knew that it will be not easy to get pregnant for me. I did it more for fun..
And funny thing when I did the test it showed me that I’m not pregnant and I wanted to throw the test away, but a second thought was saying to keep it for one minute more, so I did, I was sure that nothing will change in the result, ha ha, and it did.

First reaction was that I started to shivering in my body and thought: “ EVERY THING WILL CHANGE NOW, EVERYTHING.(Just want to explain I WAS a dancer and after became yoga instructor so I was on a diet almost all my life haha looking for my body shape and I was free and traveled the world since I was 19, and to get pregnant, gain 10–15 kilograms, as GP told me from the beginning, been locked at home was crazy opportunity of life changing. Plus when all your life you just care and answer for yourself and nobody else (kinda egotistical lifestyle ;) but it what happens with us after 30 years Single life.And as for some people it will appear that been 31 years old is a good age to have bambinos, but I thought, I screamed in my mind..

— “I’M NOT READYYYY YET !!!!” — for the question: — when you will be ready… My answer will be: -NEVER!!!
You always think that it was not a right moment … I m not ready… I want dance … And I don’t want to babysit all days and nights long … But from other side … Coming a question:
- So when than …

And the other problem was that I came to see my partner in Australia after we met in Fiji, so at the moment I knew that I got pregnant my visa was expiring after 3 weeks… So I was really scared about all of this situation.

And also his reaction… I was waiting him to come home so it was the hardest 3 hours. And when he finally got home I couldn’t even talk to him I started to cry and just showed him the test result and I saw that He started to smile.. So I felt better. But it was still scary and strange to think that one other person will grow inside your body …

When we went for a GP next day I couldn’t talk at all ..haha.. I just started to cry. Don’t know why I couldn’t stop. I m not the person that cries a lot. My partner was with me and he talked with Gp instead haha and ..

And it was confirmed with GP tha I m pregnant, But I kinda couldn’t believe that it happening with me. Of course I thought about children but this was always somewhere in the light far away future, but not…..NOW ! But day after day I felt better about it and that I can do it! So many generations did it before me and before both of us … And what changed everything-it was first early scan we did it at about 8 weeks … And it was magic feeling of happiness and I even can’t describe it…just something inside you melting and this feeling make you the happiest person in the world …. And other thing I thought at least after all this years of going to the gym every day and doing yoga I have big excuse to skip some of the sessions and also eat, not too much, but it what I want without guilt ☺ Sometimes even now (Malysh is 18 weeks) I still scared but I feel more calm and strong … Happy