One of the best gifts we can give our children is to teach them that they are malleable. This notion of a fixed identity is so limiting and ultimately dangerous.
I don’t believe in a fixed identity. Everyone is constantly changing and always has the ability to change. It’s so common to hear parents say ‘you’re so silly or even wow you’re so clever’. That creates a false illusion of a fixed identity.
If they constantly get negative labels it leads to insecurities and sometimes depression as they believe those words to be the truth about them. They don’t feel they can improve or grow. Similarly children that always get told they are intelligent might not put in much effort. It’s better to praise their effort.
So teaching them that they are malleable is really useful and gives them the freedom to be whatever they want to be. 💙