Grace in a Fast Paced World

Grace. This word can bring up a million different connotations. Awe. Discomfort. Peace. Cringing. Desire. Beauty. Jealousy. Freedom. The list goes on and on.

Take a moment to close your eyes, and say the word “grace” to yourself. Notice the associations that come up. What sensations do you feel in your body?

In simple terms, grace is “simple elegance or refinement of movement”. Does your mind immediately go to the Church or to twirling ballerinas? Up until recently, mine did too.

So let’s take grace outside of a religious context. Take it out of long necked ballerinas, and aristocratic heiresses, and we have a word that stands the test of time. A words that gives language around how we can navigate through our lives and maintain our sense of self.

Between the constant dinging of notifications, the never ending external pressure to do more, and the many obligatory social engagements we find ourselves in, it’s easy to lose our equilibrium.

Our schedules often don’t allow room for balance. That is until we put our foot down, and we make room.

I have a mantra I often repeat to myself when things are feeling a little too hectic- “I am the master of my own time zone”. Radical? Maybe. But it reminds me of this truth- I cannot control -nor do I want to- all the variables in life, but I can control my reaction.

I can choose to maintain a sense of grace and ease throughout all the emails, the traffic, the line for my matcha latte. I choose to stay in a state of grace.

Easier said than done. This way of life takes grit, stamina, resilience, patience, and ultimately- it’s a practice. An ever evolving practice. It’s not always easy, and from the outside, it may not look all that graceful. It may look messy, and unclear, but grace is not an aesthetic. It’s a feeling. A sensation. A way of life.

So what exactly is this feeling or sensation? Naturally, it’s going to feel different for everyone. And I can only speak from my experience.

So what does grace feel like to me? It feels like the times where I can feel myself tensing up, and I choose to relax into the intensity.

It is when I’m in a difficult conversation, and I can sense the defensive words about to spew from my mouth. But they don’t. I take a moment to recollect, and choose words that are softer, yet even more impactful.

It feels like those times when I want to blame everyone but myself, or only myself, and I realize that no one is to blame.

Grace is when I feel resistance rushing up inside me, and I decide that I won’t take action from that place. So I stop.

Sometimes the stop is nearly imperceptible, but it’s enough to give me space to reframe. To look at things through a different lens. A lens fueled by grace.

Grace is looking at a situation through every perspective you can grasp, and moving without resistance. Even through the most difficult situations.

Grace is sitting with loved ones after a loss. Grace is responding to disgruntled customers in a genuinely understanding way. Grace is using whatever anger comes up, as healthy fuel to move up against friction, and break through to find a greater understanding of the situation.

This can all seem very esoteric. But there are real, practical ways to harness and cultivate grace. With the ever growing health and wellness industries, there are a million ways to cleanse, destress, and relax. Which can be helpful when cultivating grace. But they’re not necessary. Grace can not be bought. It can not be found through Instagram followers, hashtags, float tanks, or fancy facials.

It can be uncovered, little by little through personal practice.

Go out in nature. Sink your feet into the Earth, and feel the Sun’s rays penetrate your resistance.

Dance. Move and shake your body. Wiggle on the floor. Do cartwheels or somersaults. Whatever movements get you out of your mind, and into your body.

Focus on one task at a time.

Eating? Put down your fork between bites, chew slowly, and taste every subtle flavor of your nourishing meal.

Intuition? Follow it, listen to your inner voice.

Humor? We can’t take it all so seriously. We’re going to fumble and fall, let’s be able to laugh with the process.

Do the activities that you know bring you ease. Little by little, you will find what works for you.

Over time, there will be an extra sense that develops in you. A sense of patience and understanding. Of endless energy, and curious creativity.

Grace is genderless, ageless, it moves throughout all cultures. Look at people that you admire from all different ages, demographics, and backgrounds. Notice the different ways these people show grace, and how it has shaped their lives.

There are figures of grace in every field from politicians to professors. Athletes to activists. Fashion designers to farmers. Birth workers to baristas.

We all have an innate sense of grace. Overtime, we understand how to use it. In my experience, it has been a lot less of learning something new, and more like the shedding of layers. Old patterns and habits that kept me from moving freely.

Grace is acting from a place of true authenticity. Learning what your strengths and weaknesses are. Your dreams and desires. All while allowing these things to evolve with time, and with you.

Grace is timeless. Grace is forgiving. Grace is loving. Grace can be found in every living thing. Sometimes, we just need to make space for it to shine through.