Life’s Many Contradictions And Why We Fail Without Them
My non-scientific approach to my life’s whacky contradictions
I rather DIE than eat that way they say.
Sink or swim!
To receive, you must give!
Life throws us many contradictions to test us. To test us on what’s important. On what matters.
“Humans live peacefully with contradictions precisely because of their capacity to compartmentalize.”
As we go through life, we live by opposite views points pulling us in different directions.
These contradictions make us human. These contradictions make me, me.
I’m an ADD, introvert with a Type A personality.
In reality, all three of these personality types are a contradiction of themselves.
Aggressive type A personalities are typically extroverted. Not me. I’ll punch you in the mouth. Yell and scream. And then go seclude myself in a hot bath for hours to regenerate.
People with ADD are classified as bouncing off the wall from one task to another, yet, I get more done in 4 hours than most people get done in 8.
It’s taken me over 30 years to find my balance. To tame the storm. To tame my personality contradictions.
Being aggressive is terrible in a lot of situations. I’ve had to lean on my introversion to balance out. To seclude myself and breath through a problem.
Yet, this approach in more demanding situations doesn’t work.
A great example is a crappy company who owes me over $40,000.
I want to fly out and wring the CEOs neck. Literally. It’s crossed my mind 30 times. I’ve run the scenario in my head dozens of times if I ever meet them at a conference.
I’ll trip him in the hall.
I’ll picket their booth, “they don’t pay, they play, with your moonnayyy!”
Or another company who owed me over $400,000. I wanted to beat my own ass, as the risk was not worth the reward.
I would overwhelm myself with thoughts. My type A personality would take control of my mind.
Or how about my extreme joy for writing and reading. Now that’s an ADD slap in the face.
My life is a personality contradiction yet each gives me a unique ability.
To succeed, you must fail.
I’ve yelled at screamed more times than I want to admit in my career. An ultimate failure in human communication, which has now led me to a more gentle approach, with everyone.
Losing millions of dollars has led me to make decisions that have made my company millions.
I’ve failed hundreds of times, and I’ve succeeded many times more than that.
I make a half-joke that I’m right only 95% of the time. The 5% that I’m wrong hurts. It’s painful. I learn from it.
For me to succeed, I must fail.
The more uncomfortable I am, the more I should lean into it.
I hated public speaking. I hated being the center of attention.
But now, here I am, the public figure of an international company.
I post public articles and videos. I write for media sites. I hold company meetings. I publish life’s truths, my truths, for all to learn from.
The more I’ve done this, the more I’ve become comfortable being uncomfortable.
Less is more.
Life throws us more. More food. More products. More people.
But the less you have, the happier you’ll be.
A great example of this is in Valter Longo excellent book, “The Longevity Diet.” To starve cancer cells, you must “starve.” To survive and thrive, you must go hungry.
I’ve always been the type who wasn’t okay with the status quo. I wanted more revenue. A bigger company. More companies. With all that, comes more chaos.
The more you have, the less you feel.
Now, I’m happy reading, writing and creating all day. I want less. Less of everything.
If I could walk to work, I would.
Less is more.
When given more choices, you have more trouble deciding.
I’ve written on the Choice Paradox before. The more choices we have, the harder it is to choose.
How’s that for a contradiction.
The small things over time have a significant impact.
Warren Buffet has made his fortunes on the principle of compounding over time.
He invests and holds. He never sells. He’s patient.
”Fall in love with patience early on to be able to be fast for the rest of your life 💨”
I hate patience.
I’ll throw a fit if I have to wait. Wait in line. Wait for results. Wait for anything.
I want it now. Now, now, now. Like a big baby kicking and screaming.
That’s why it’s so important. No one is patient enough to wait. To wait to achieve the goal. To achieve success.
No one want’s to plan the goal. To map out its execution. To make small incremental gains each and every day.
James Altucher says to improve on something only 1% a day. Just 1%!
Are you patient enough for that?
Take reading. Read for 30 minutes a day, and it’s only 2% of your day. If you just do that, every day, you’ll gain mass knowledge over time.
In business, small incremental improvements to your quarterly goal, each and every day, will ensure you hit your target.
The more you want it, the less you’ll get it.
When I started in sales, I always chased the Golden Goose. The big order. The big client. Every RFQ. I wanted it all.
My thought was, if it had a sales pulse, I’ll try and close it.
I wanted more clients. More revenue. More growth.
It’s the Golden Goose. Always chasing that fictitious dream. That fictitious result.
It clouds your focus. It stresses you out. It’s not worth it.
The more you become desperate, the more that thing will distance itself from you.
Hustle is best met with balance.
If you hustle your face off 24/7, you’ll burn out. Burning out will stop you short of your life’s mission.
Hustling is excellent, but it’s best met with balance.
Life has many whack contradictions and the biggest one of all, to be born, you also must die.
What contradictions rule your life?
Thanks for Reading!