First of all, I’d like to acknowledge and express my appreciation for the fact that for all our disagreements here, you have seen that I’m doing my best. Even if I’m wrong, I want to do what’s right and I’m glad you can see that. I know the same is true of you as well.

Secondly, I do speak forcefully for marginalized groups, including trans people, to dominant classes. I know that all you know about me is that I’m giving unsolicited advice to an oppressed group, but that is literally all you know about me. The vast majority of my time discussing politics is in defense of the poor, racial minorities, immigrants, and LGBTQ communities.

I have been honing my online debating skills since 2000, and I’ve found consistently that when I take things personally, or attack the character of the person I’m debating, I get 100% bad results. When I take those elements out, I still get a lot of bad results, but occasionally I do reach people who are disarmed by my respectful tone — even some people I thought were lost causes.

Also, I have heard and read multiple accounts from people who have said that their minds were changed by what they observed in online debates between other people. These are the lurkers you never see but they are watching and processing nonetheless. They are convinceable, and they generally sway toward the person or group that acts with the greatest kindness and level-headedness, irrespective of the logical arguments presented. I often engage with “lost causes" because of the value it has in convincing the people who are watching but not participating.

I should also point out that I’m not advocating being docile or complacent. If you’re being talked over, definitely make your voice heard! If someone calls that bitchy, that’s their misogynist problem. But once you have the hard-fought floor, make the best use of it. Make sure you aren’t helping them otherize you. Engage their human spirit, not their wounded ego, as best you can. It works because it is only their human spirit that can see you for who you are; attack their ego, and they go into defense mode and double down on otherizing you. It’s been proven to work in studies. It’s not easy, and as a trans person I’m sure that even if you were to follow my advice, it would look very different than the way I do it. People defer to me more readily, so I don’t have to work as hard at it, and I have worked hard! But I do believe it’s a principle worth implementing, purely on practical grounds.