Almost a Chemist

One of the prerequisites for my bachelor’s degree was a full year of inorganic chemistry, which I took at Olympic College, the junior college in my town. The professor of this class, Bob Kieburtz, was something like a kindly wizard. With a neatly trimmed grey beard, thin frame, and gentle demeanor, he brought to life the magic of molecules, moles, and the periodic table.

Bob Kieburtz loved to teach chemistry. From him I learned unbelievable, yet true, things about our world—like how atoms are mostly a vacuum of space with a probability distribution for their particle positions, so we and everything else are basically just emptiness colliding into one another, but atoms are so small it feels solid at people-scale. I learned that chemistry is really just physics and math, and that you could answer a lot of questions with a well-structured experiment and some algebra. I learned that dangerous reagents are fun, and that you could mix up a bunch of innocuous clear liquids to get all sorts of colors, textures, and smells. Alchemy really works, kind of.

His tests were hard. He explained up-front that he always gave more problems than he expected anyone to complete, and that most people would end up in the range of a C grade. However, he adjusted up on a curve so the top student would receive an A anyway, because he really just wanted us to get used to hard work and tough problems as scientists.

At the end of the year, Mr. Kieburtz gave an award for the most promising young chemist, complete with a hardbound copy of the four-inch thick Inorganic Materials Chemistry Desk Reference. He gave it to this punky goth girl who you’d never think would want to be a chemist. I was jealous because I thought I’d done pretty well myself, but we all knew she was the best and that she loved it. Kieburtz didn’t care about appearances, he cared about potential.

My major was Environmental Science, but I began thinking I’d pursue further chemistry education and possibly shift my career plans to chemical engineering or environmental chemistry. This was the first time I’d really fallen in love with a discipline, and I’m very fortunate that it’s happened more than once as my education and career has progressed.

I count Bob Kieburtz as a major influence in my love of science today, and he almost got me into a career in chemistry. But this auspicious start wouldn’t last. I took organic chemistry next, and fuck that.