
Everything started on January the first of 2019. It was the morning of a new year when I saw your picture and we started to talk. Everything was just so easy going, like if there were a reason to start to know us each other. One song, maybe just another. It was clear that this should start like a playlist with your name. I still remember the days when the inspiration just came here with fifty or maybe one hundred songs. I just wanted to know you more. Even I didn’t know so much about you. We liked the sunsets, we lived in different cities, but the most important: we were crazy about the music. But from this time for me, you were not so far. Even you were more than one thousand kilometers from my place. You had difficult times and I just wanted to be there as your friend, when you had a fight with your last partner. I wanted to be a part of your story as I was letting you be part of mine in my current projects.
Señales Luminosas — Gustavo Cerati
There was the perfect excuse to meet each other in the same place, to spend the weekend, in my mind, it was the time to take the risk to be there. But from the first moment, there were a lot of signals that maybe we were not in the same way. Anyway, we had that dinner when any of us was allowed to talk about anything we wanted. Our inner fears, our lives and that starry night walking in an unknown city. For me, that was the right path to follow, just before taking off in a plane where the only thing you could see in the night where those light signals.
I was in a different country, tired and feeling a little lonely. All the time I just was talking with you and counting the days to see you again. The week passed really fast but after saying what I was feeling to you, everything suddenly stopped and changed. There was a lot of disconnection the time we could meet again. You were talking with someone else. I tried so hard to have a good time, even the sunset was great. But I couldn’t. Something was already broken. I took your hand very hard before going to sleep but I already know that I was losing you. In the concert, having you so distant by my side, I was happy that they didn’t play our last song, when everything was already out of control, that time in the last sunset it was really our last goodbye.
One time I told you what was my worst fear: to be considered again just like a friend. It was that night with the same song, running in Reforma, like two months ago I told you that it was going to be so hard for me to feel again and lost in the same way. But that happened, from the day you forgot my birthday, that everything started to fall more evidently and the silence was becoming more clear. By the time I just wanted the world to stop from what it was becoming.
Ready to Let Go — Cage the Elephant
There always be a new song, even we don’t want to. I was already sick and my life full of pressures and changes. I was becoming paranoid about the things that were happening and I was really tired. Even I didn’t want to stop being there, I was not feeling well and knowing the real ending was near. You can’t be prepared for the night that is about to come. You just have to be ready.
Tough you were my copilot. From the first day. For me, you were very important to let you go. From my creative side, my projects and all those things that we talked about every day of the last six months. But suddenly the unanswered calls were more frequent, the silences and the last part where I had to lose my mind that important day, just to be aware that you already had taken the choice to choose your way, saying that you wanted me by your side just like a friend cause you couldn’t offer anymore and never feel the way I did about me. As the song says: you just were waiting for your wings to dry.
Now it’s time to erase your playlist and start some new ones. I’ll just keep this #6tracks from now on.
