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Black Books Matter

Not trying to sell shit to y'all, exactly but full disclosure: book talk. Because books about us by us are far and few between or unknown.

Somehow, despite everything, the first Integrated Non-Monogamy book, Aro Eros Arrows, will be out on Valentine's Day, during Black History month, affirming BlaQueer noncismen who never get books about our experiences.

We already know publishing so yte. Over 99%. How could they give love and life to our tales?

This series is for everyone marked undesirable by isty ideals: that means Black, queer, disabled, fat, aromantic, asexual, indigenous, heaux, intersex, autistic, sex workers, trans, and on and on. It is especially a huge "fuck you" from those like me who are many or all of those things at once.

It's for everyone who folks like to pretend don't belong in the polyamorous community, for folks who are told they don't deserve love, for those who actually value friendship because we know it's how we survive.

We stay creating communities of care, but we lack media that affirms that and credits us for our work. We lack stories and news that center our desire, our glory, our unrepentant lust for life.

That's why I write. For so long my writing was my only mirror, reflecting the world's fucked up boxes that sought to bifurcate me and simultaneously my scream for freedom on my terms. I created space for myself in a world that erased it at every turn.

Living and loving and fucking unapologetically can get us killed so quick in this world. But they can't stop it. They can't tame it. They can deny it all they want, but we exist. We deserve so much better. Folks love to say love is the answer: can you imagine if they genuinely and without expectation truly loved us, rather than always leaving us to fend for ourselves?

"Love is not my motivation; it is my state of being. You cannot tempt me with the promise of your scraps when I feed myself."