How to make our beliefs match with our words and our behavior? It’s simple but not easy.
Some things are simple to say but not easy to practice.
One of the most difficult things in life is to be coherent because nobody taught us how to act, speak and react in accordance to our way of thinking.
We are so used to seeing incongruence in our society because it proliferates everywhere that we take it as normal.
How many of us haven’t ever met a Doctor who smocks heavily and is addicted to alcohol? If we lived a life in accordance to our believes doctors would take good care of themselves in order to be that living example of healthy life
I have also realized that information without the practical application is simply dead knowledge. In my church there was a lady who graduated from one of the most prestigious universities in my country with excellent grades but when she discovered that her husband had been disloyal to her she was at the verge of losing complete contact with reality. Her husband decided to divorce her because he was completely into this younger and sexier woman and obviously that smashed my friend self esteem and her willing to live. For a very long period of time her relatives felt she was never the same person she used to be and to be completely honest she hasn’t been able to come back to normalcy. Now I wonder how a psychologist can help people with their mental problems but cannot be capable of overcoming her own heartaches.
Now let’s talk about the church and the pastors. The fact of a pastor making 4 years of theology, knowing the Bible by memory from Genesis to Revelation; being a guru in all the oratory techniques body, hands and eyes movements ; having the perfect pitch, intonation, voice inflexion doesn’t make him a great pastor who loves and cares for the people in the church. However, in the church the pastor and priest are supposed to have a calling for service and love. God who is presented in the Bible as a loving God who sent his Son to demonstrate how much he cared for humanity is the highest and the noblest example of love and sacrifice, therefore, it sounds logical that people who decide to follow this path have this special trait of being a people person.
Now let’s picture this: A veterinarian who has an accurate understanding of cats and dog’s anatomy and knows what is the perfect treatment for every case that arrives to the vet office but he simply hates animals, barks and meows; a high school math teacher who has a doctorate in mathematics and graduated with honors but hates teenagers and a kinder garden teacher who dislikes kids.
All of these examples are weird, aren’t they? Well it is the way our lives look like sometimes and I guess that everything started at home. Our parents told us not to lie but when the neighbor knocked at the door our moms asked us to please tell her she wasn’t at home. Our dads repeated us to be respectful and obedient but we saw them insulting people in the middle of the highway when that crazy driver almost crashed our car. Our parents said that they loved us dearly but when they got angry they beat us very violently and we grew up thinking that it was normal to be aggressive when we love and in consequence we have two antagonist concepts that become synonymous in our minds. There are parents who almost never had the time to sit down with their children to help them with their homework, to comfort them when we were bullied because they were too busy with their jobs and their social lives that there was just no time for kids education, therefore, some of them grew up connecting love with negligence.
It’s the moment to break that vicious cycle. It’s time to unlearn in order to learn.
Let’s think about it: Why would you be a vet if your passion is to be a writer? Why would you pastor a church if deep down what you really want to do is to make money and become a businessman? Why would anyone teach if his real will is to design? We say YES when we want to say NO, and we say NO when we want to say YES.
Now if you ask me how to become more coherent the answer would be: I don’t know but what I do know is that one of the first steps is to be honest with yourself to understand, and then the second thing to do is to have the courage to accept what we really want and don’t want in life. The next step could be to summon the courage to make changes in life in order to discard those things that disturb us and replace them by the things we really want to do. I know it is simply to say but not easy to apply.
I admire people, who lived in their convictions to the point that they were willing to give up everything because they were one with their values. They didn’t settle and they just denied accepting the status quo. When I see the life of Martin Luther King, for example, who was threatened to be killed with his family if he didn’t stop combating racial inequality and he still continued to struggle against segregation my mind boggles because he just couldn’t avoid going living what he lived because he was the dream incarnated he didn’t just “Have a dream”, HE WAS THE DREAM. Evidently, we will all agree that his life was full of meaning so much so that there is a before and after King in history. He knew what life expected from him and he just couldn’t take his mission off his head because he was the personification of it.
We are in the year 2017 and it is our turn to tune in to the station of our calling, accept it and then act on it.
Let’s get out of the comfort zone to enter into the meaningful zone.