I mostly agree, and I do get the point you’re trying to make and what I’m about to say possibly seems counter-productive. However I disagree that the tea analogy suffers from these problems in the same way as the others.
To me, having a cup of tea with someone is not an exchange, at least not in the sense of $5 or a car. To me it is very analogous to having sex (although it feels strange to say that). It’s as much about the time spent with someone, the connection and furthering the relationship as it does about swallowing a liquid. So yes, having someone force tea down my throat (besides me having a very strong gag reflex so anything unwillingly going down my throat is unpleasant) does seem to be to be “tea violence”. I think perhaps the analogy is not so much downplaying the importance of consent, but perhaps you’re missing the importance of tea.