What will happen if tamilnadu gets separated from India?

If it gets separated, O. Paneerselvam will become the Prime Minister of the new nation and represent the new country in United Nations and other bodies. Ms. Sasikala could become the President. The two can tour the world interacting with world leaders and charm the globe to get new treaties and trade pacts while dancing for the national anthem of “Takkaru Takkaru”. Imagine that delight in the face of patriotic Tamils.

Bull will be the national animal and “#BanPETA and #SaveJallikattu” will be national motto. Jayalalitha would be the “Mother of the Nation” and might be in all the currency notes to be printed from Sivakasi. The Dravidian parties can then take their things on a global scale. The new capital will switch between Mannargudi and Chennai every 5 years. Sometimes a Parliament building will be constructed and then later used as a hospital.

The new nation would have to negotiate a water treaty with India and the latter might not agree on anything. Maybe after decades World Bank would negotiate a water sharing treaty like it did between India and Pakistan. In such a case, half or more of Cauvery will remain in India. Tamil Nadu right now gets more than half of the river Cauvery and still if it is not sufficient imagine an internationally negotiated treaty that reduces its share. Even that much will not be available from Krishna, Mullaperiyar and other water sources. Starvation and lower agricultural productivity.

Oh, don’t worry we have the leaders to manage this - I’m sure Paneerselvam with his alternatives like Thirumavalavan, Stalin and other can take on such challenges. If needed Mr. Alagiri can always display his diplomatic and organizational skills. They can also be aided by people drawing stuff on chart paper and bring to the beach. If enough fun is not had, we can ask Mr. Seeman to bring in a dead Sri Lankan leader’s picture.

The new nation has to build an army from scratch. There are only a few Tamils in the army and even some of those might not migrate to the new nation. That means a new army and new set of training that will take decades to mature. Oh, let’s not worry. If we can do social media forwards we can also fight in the battlefields. Can’t we?

Sri Lankan navy will continue to shoot the fishermen deliberately fishing in their territory and now that the new Tamil nation would not even have a capable navy for a long time, there would not be any big response. Once the Tamil nation develops a good navy after a long time, we can have fun wars with Sri Lanka. For once Tamil Nadu can feel what it is like to be at the border and fight constant wars. Since Tamil Nadu will be comparable in size to Sri Lanka, the latter would not have much fear.

The new nation would not have the benefit of cities like Bangalore and Mumbai and have to accomodate the returning expats from rest of India - in its only metropolis of Chennai. And no central government institution for anything - remove those IIT, IIM, NIT and other institutions - our state government is capable of running world class institutions.

The new nation can take out Hindi and English too. Oh, the languages of darn corporates. Just like Bangladesh, we can have everything in our native language. We also know the great things that happen when people try to construct a nation around a particular language, religion etc. See the gory history of nation states. We will all resign our jobs and live the life of agriculture. So much money to be made in farming that can sustain all of us 75 million people.

Oh the favorable freight arrangement that Tamil Nadu got that ensures minerals from Bihar and other regions are given at as much price as the mineral producing states. Oh that is gone too. Chennai’s industrial output is going to be hampered.

And we didn’t even get to India’s behavior and reaction after an hostile exit from it. India’s tiny little military is the world’s fourth largest and even after Tamil Nadu’s exit it might retain that ranking. Good luck trying to spend a lot of your GDP in a staring match with it.

With unity, we can all scale great heights as Indians. Or we can split apart and suck our thumbs. This is true for every state in the union - no state in the country is special enough to survive as a great nation outside. Every state benefits by being in the union. Whether you are a Tamilian or Punjabi or Assamese or Kashmiri, your speciality will only be as long as you stay in India. You can fully claim the history of the subcontinent, its great wonders, diversity, struggles and empires. Outside that all of these will be mere banana republics no more important than Syria or Nicaragua - one among the 200 odd nations that people might not even know until there is a chaos.

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