Habits at the Dinner Table That Make Guests Uncomfortable
A delicious dinner party ensures that guests leave feeling full and relaxed. To achieve this, hosts should avoid habits that annoy guests.
Not Considering Seating Arrangements
If you’re hosting a dinner for a group, relationship and body language expert Nicole Moore advises arranging seating that suits everyone. “Many guests feel awkward approaching a dinner table without knowing where to sit, leading to choosing a seat that may not be ideal. Don’t put effort into welcoming guests and then forget to guide them to their seats,” Moore said.
While you may not want to make strict seating requests, it’s helpful to suggest to guests where to sit to avoid confusion and pressure.
Using Phones at the Table
When hosting a dinner, you shouldn’t place phones on the table. According to Moore, as the host, it’s important to make guests feel respected. “But using your phone while eating is one of the easiest ways to make them feel like you’re not paying attention to them,” Moore said.
Moreover, when the host uses a phone at the table, it sends a signal that others can do the same. This can lead to a lack of focus among everyone.
Talking Before Finishing Eating
According to Mason Farmani, a personal and business life coach in Florida, apart from using phones, a habit that makes people uncomfortable is talking with food in their mouths or talking before swallowing.
When not eating with others, you can eat as you wish. However, remember that talking with food in your mouth is often seen as impolite and discomforting.
“You’re talking with your mouth full or speaking while eating can make others feel less appetized as it goes against the desire to maintain cleanliness and manners during the meal,” Farmani said.
Arguments at the Table
No one wants to gather for dinner only to become an audience in your latest argument with a family member.
Seth Eisenberg, a relationship expert and executive director of the PAIRS Foundation, an organization that provides training for successful relationships, said nothing makes guests more uncomfortable than witnessing a couple or a family arguing at the table. “It’s worse than watching a dog eat with your fork or a child crying,” Eisenberg noted.
According to Dr. Kubanych Takyrbashev, a behavior and health expert, sensitive topics don’t always have a place at the dinner table.
While stimulating, it’s best to avoid controversial topics such as politics or religion. These topics can cause discomfort or alienate guests with different views. “This oversight can lead to awkwardness or even conflict at the dinner table, diminishing the enjoyment of the meal together,” Takyrbashev said.
Only Talking to Closest Friends
According to Moore, when hosting a dinner, your task is to ensure all guests feel involved in the conversation. “Don’t get too caught up in your own conversation to the point of forgetting about guests sitting farther away,” Moore said.
This often becomes an issue in dinners with long tables, as those sitting in the middle may feel too far to join in on conversations happening on either side.
If you notice a part of the dinner seems dull or quiet, ask a specific question to engage them back in the conversation. “You can also step over to where they are and interact directly to make them feel important,” Moore suggested.
Dominating the Conversation
When the host dominates conversations, they inadvertently create an environment that makes guests feel sidelined or unable to contribute. Takyrbashev said while it’s important to promote conversation, you need to understand your potential impact on inclusivity.
“Guests may hesitate to interject or share their thoughts, leading to a one-sided conversation that fails to engage all participants,” he cautioned.
Ignoring Dietary Preferences or Restrictions
When planning a dinner or choosing a restaurant, technically, you have the freedom to choose any food you want. However, if you’re concerned about your guests, you must consider their needs.
Ignoring or criticizing dietary restrictions or preferences can make guests feel unwelcome or anxious about what they can eat. This can lead to discomfort, feeling undervalued, or not respected.
